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5 Ways to Recognize Topping from the Bottom

Topping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. The idea behind the term is to actually help submissives understand their role, and isn't more than a faux paus. During interactions with your Dominant, it's a lesson to know that you can't control what is going on.

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Topping from the Bottom

Topping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. Topping from the bottom is when you simultaneously adopt both roles. This could be in the form of giving commands, refusing requests or moving to control the location of impacts during play. Generally, it is frowned upon to try to force the Dominant’s hand to do something they do not wish to do.

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When Is It Okay to Top From the Bottom?

Topping from the bottom has been given a bad wrap. It's considered by many to be a faux pax for any submissive. Online communities shun and shame many people who even ask about the subject and want to know if what they did was considered wrong. Too many people tell these people that yes it was wrong even if it really isn't. Today I'd like to tell you that there are a few perfectly valid situations where topping from the bottom is not only necessary but welcome. That's right, the fear of topping from the bottom doesn't have to bring fear to the heart of a submissive.

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The Real Truth Behind the Fear of Topping from the Bottom

Bottom topping isn't as bad as it is hyped. The fear of doing this is overblown hype, for the most part.

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Why You Should Know the Truth About Topping from the Bottom

Ask one hundred submissives why they consider topping from the bottom as bad and they will likely come up with something relating to "forcing the Dominant's hand." They'd be right. The real, honest to goodness, truth is that forcing the Dominant's hand is the only way you can bottom-top. How you do that is situational, different for different people or different reasons and you really can't list the exact ways that it comes about.

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How to Ask for More BDSM Playtime

Once you open up to allowing yourself to ask for what you want you will find so many more doors open for you.

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How to Be Responsive During Play Without Being Demanding

You walk a tightrope of topping from the bottom and being a good receptive bottom when you learn how to be responsive during play.

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Why Your Sexual Needs Matter in a D/s Relationship (or ANY Relationship)

Other than fulfilling pleasure, your sexual needs are just as important as any other needs you have in a relationship; from love or happiness, trust and honesty, being taken care of or anything else you've determined is a need for you in a relationship.

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Learn to Speak Up and Speak Out: Empowering Yourself to Have a Voice

But asking for what I want and raising concerns to him is topping from the bottom! No, no it's not. You do, in fact, have to tell them what you are thinking and feeling.

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Must I Always Wait for My Dominant to Tell me What to Do?

You aren't a doormat. As a submissive, you can have autonomy and an active submission you can be proud of. So, must you always wait for orders? You tell me.

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