Oftentimes, with novice submissives, it is assumed that showing any sort of desire for something that was not suggested by the Dominant would be topping from the bottom. Let me tell you now, having desires and asking for them to be fulfilled is not topping from the bottom.
Read The Article | Find SimilarNo matter how you go about it, setting realistic goals and then working towards success is a step by step process. You have the tools available to make changes in your life if you want them. It doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Treat them like anything else in your life worth doing and you can make it. Use the resources below to make the progress stick.
Read The Series | Find SimilarNot long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.
Read The Series | Find SimilarSo, you’ve discovered this great big world of BDSM and you just don’t know what to do now. Welcome! I suggest you start here in learning some of the vocabulary you’ll find around the internet and I want to help you get your head around all the things you’ll encounter, just a bit at a time.
Read The Series | Find SimilarChris Lyon has written a fantastic book that does a great job describing and detailing the two roles of a leading and supportive relationship without all the kink, discipline and fetish mumbo jumbo that tends to muddy our understanding when we get involved in BDSM.
Read The Review | Find SimilarThe more you hold in, the less you are really getting in your submission that you could potentially be enjoying. Open your mouth and speak up. Make your live how you'd like it. Stop dreaming of talking to your Dominant and start doing it.
Read The Article | Find SimilarBottom topping isn't as bad as it is hyped. The fear of doing this is overblown hype, for the most part.
Read The Article | Find SimilarSubmissive or not; once you've learned how to communicate effectively don't settle for less.
Read The Article | Find SimilarOnce you open up to allowing yourself to ask for what you want you will find so many more doors open for you.
Read The Article | Find SimilarI've spent some time trying to muster up a list of identifying features of Dominants and Jerks just to see what I can come up with. Hopefully, they can help you identify why you may be miserable with the partner you are currently with.
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