Continuing on the topic of processing pain we come to a very basic question, "What's the benefit of this pain, anyway?"
If you aren't a masochist this can be a question with no clear answer. Some say, "it is part of submission," others "to please their Sadistic Top," and still others can say, "the benefits are endorphins and adrenaline rushes." Each of our D/s relationships is unique and as submissives we choose to experience pain from our Dominant's hand or we don't. There's room for all sorts of variations in the spectrum. This series is not for those who have no SM in their exchange, however.
For those of us who do, it is important to understand what we get from experiencing pain in a play aspect. These are just a few of the benefits of experiencing pain in play. I encourage you to share your own benefits in the comments below this post. What is the benefit of pain for you?
I'm Seeking Sub Space
The ultimate goal for many submissives in pain play is that elusive 'space' called sub space. To reach it is to be in utter peace and bliss. There are a couple of posts about sub space that you can read for specifics on this phenomenon. The endorphins that are released during pain play can lead to a feeling of light-headedness, euphoria and sometimes out of body-like experiences. In most people, this happens due to intense pain processing and sensations related to it. Working to learn pain processing techniques as described earlier can help you develop an understanding of how your body reacts to the endorphins and if you can release and let yourself float into sub space or not.
Not everyone who enjoys pain play gets to sub space - it's related completely on your body's ability to process pain and how you respond to your body. You aren't a good or bad person if you can't get to sub space and I highly recommend not making it the goal of every single play session. A sadist Top is not going to want their partner in sub space. The responses that sadists feed off of completely stop when you reach this altered state, making the enjoyment that they would get out of it completely missing.
That's not to say that some Tops don't enjoy getting their bottoms to sub space. It can be a very freeing feeling to know that you are in such a relaxed and trusting place to allow the Top to care for you during sub space.
I'm Seeking Catharsis
For some of us submissives, we need pain play as a way to escape or to allow our emotions free reign. There are numerous times I have asked for a healing flogging from my Master because I need to release stress or have some sadness or anger to get over. Administered pain can be an excellent tool for stress relief and catharsis. Pain given in this way is usually steady and rhythmic. It has a constant pain level so that the bottom won't get jolted with pain, but endure a regular repetitive dose.
Often, a healing pain session ends with crying or screaming or intense emotional outpouring of other sorts. The Top is like a therapist that knows just what level of pain you need to get you to express your bottled up emotions, or uses the pain to get you to let go of responsibility.
I'm Seeking Pleasure
For some bottoms, pain is a direct link to pleasure. It is often said that the line between pain and pleasure is blurred and for these bottoms, that line is easily crossed. Pain for this person brings sexually heightened emotions, pleasure, and orgasms. For others still, pain is the pleasure. The sensations of pain, usually intense is what turns them on and drives them to an intimacy that isn't shared with anyone other than the Top administering to them.
Pain and pleasure mixed isn't a common relation, but worth thinking about. How are pain and pleasure blurred for you?
Processing Pain in Play Series
- What is the Natural Process?
- Negative Pain Management Techniques
- Positive Pain Management Techniques
- Learning a Processing Technique
- This post: What is the Benefit of Pain Anyway?
- What Can Interrupt or Block Pain Processing?
- Overcoming the False Edge
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