I was asked in an email for some help from a girl that was confused about the information she was given by submissives bent on giving her 'good' advice. She's been happy in a relationship with her Dominant and while they live a D/s life she's always seeking more advice on the right way to do things. In her advice gathering, she was told that they weren't doing it right; that she needs to address all Dominants as Sir, and that her interactions weren't genuine.
The issue I have with this is that so many people have this idea that if people don't do things the way they think they should, that for some reason, they are doing it wrong. It can be as simple as using Sir or Ma'am with all Dominants, to how to present yourself for your Dominant.
The media and books do portray certain aspects of our lifestyle incorrectly or set standards that just aren't realistic. The worst offender is online chat rooms, which have their own protocols and behaviors that a lot of people tend to try and cross over into face to face interactions. Submissives can see this as the way things should be done, and not one of many ways that things are done.
I always define this sort of behavior as ignorance and naive. So, let me put my foot down right now on my stance. There is no one way to live this life. There is only YOUR way. Your way is the true way for you; no one else.
So what I'd like you to take from this is that when you give advice, keep it open minded. It is possible to learn a new way to do something that you never thought possible. Everyone has a unique take on their life and their love of BDSM and D/s.
What's your take? Have you had someone tell you that you aren't doing it right? How did it make you feel?