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Don't Embarrass Yourself: Learn the Etiquette for Play Parties Before You Go

Each social situation we expose ourselves to has it's own set of rules and behaviors. This is also true of BDSM events, perhaps even moreso. A play party will have different rules at each location you may attend one. There will be established rules as well as house/location rules. There are also unspoken rules that many relationships have in place. Let's cover some of each category.

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Play Parties

When you enter the local BDSM community one of the events you may be exposed to is a play party. A play party is an essentially a party where BDSM play can occur. Groups hold parties as a way to learn and educate on safe play methods, chat about topics and generally hang around.Learning about play parties may be intimidating at first but they don’t have to be.

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Munches

If you’re new, you may have never heard of munches. They are basically gatherings of kinky folk that get together to share food and friendship in a casual atmosphere. But how do you find one? What are they like? Will you be stared at? Let’s answer the questions and dispel the worry and encourage you to head out into the world to your local BDSM community.

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Rules, Rituals and Protocol

Rituals and protocols can add richness, structure and even a little fun to a D/s relationship. Knowing the difference between the two can help the submissive better understand the desires and intentions of the dominant, and to be more pleasing when performing them.

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Safewords

A safeword is a vocal brake in play; one that typically halts play completely, but can also be one where slowing down is the direction. It is a simple word or phrase that requires very little thought process to utter as a sign of distress or caution. Understand how to select your safeword and why it’s important in the following articles.

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Play Nice: Some Notes on Scene Etiquette and Leather Protocol (Part 4 of 7) - Play Parties

In part 4 of Ambrosio's series on Protocol and Etiquette, it's play parties! Come read a set of sample party rules and three different types of parties you may encounter in your local BDSM community.

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Entering the Community: Understanding and Following General Protocols in Public

Low and high protocol events require different rules and behaviors. Here's how you navigate them, they aren't as scary as you think!

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What are Dress Protocols?

A dress protocol is established by a Dominant as the way a submissive is to present themselves for any specific situation. These can be basic grooming habits to very precise details to what to wear to dinner or bed. A lot of times these are the first rules established in a relationship. These can start out as directions for when and what to keep shaved, how to care for your hair, or if you can wear panties or not.

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D/s Dating

Dating is dating. It’s not easy and how we approach it affects the outcome. Once you adjust your thinking to how we go about dating and the changes in life that the Lifestyle brings upon us you will see that finding a partner is never easy.

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Entering the BDSM Community

Kayla Lords’ excellent series about Entering the BDSM and D/s communities! You’ll learn what your first munch or party might be like, what to expect as far as rules and dress and where to begin your search for your own community!

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