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4 Things to Look for in a BDSM Mentor

In BDSM it is sometimes recommended to newbies to pick up a mentor but they are never given the tools to find a mentor that is right for them. I know that when I first started out there were good people to be around and not so great people that left their mark on me. There are a few things I'd like you to look for the next time you seek out a mentor for your life.

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Mentors

Applying mentoring to a BDSM context a mentor is someone that guides and advises a newbie on what to expect, things they might want learn and other items. I believe a mentor should be on the same level as you. There are many opinions out there, but common sense advice can be found in the following series of articles about mentors.

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I Need Help Finding a Mentor

I was wondering how I can get a submissive mentor? I'd like to talk about things with someone that has experience. I am on fetlife but I don't love posting things where everyone can see. Can you help me find someone?

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A Mentor is Not Your Dom: Learning How to Connect with Experienced People For Submissive Development

If a Dominant approaches you and offers to be your mentor, make sure you clarify with them what you expect from them and for your own sake, keep it platonic. Your personal growth will be much improved and when that perfect Dominant comes along you'll be ready.

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What is a Submissive Mentor?

A mentor is a counselor and adviser for newcomers. Mentors usually provide an experienced view of the area being explored by the new person. They can provide training and teach the proper way that things should be done so that cautious movements become confidence.

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D/s Dating

Dating is dating. It’s not easy and how we approach it affects the outcome. Once you adjust your thinking to how we go about dating and the changes in life that the Lifestyle brings upon us you will see that finding a partner is never easy.

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Mentorships - What to Do Before the Process Begins

Like all relationships, the mentoring one is not one to be entered into lightly - not because things have to be intense but because they could be. The main thing about a mentorship is that everyone is on the same page about expectations and that the lines of communication remain open. With that in mind, there are a few things to consider when seeking a mentor.

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How Often Have You Said: "I Don't Know What's Expected of Me, But I'd Like To"?

Let me tell you what you can do to make sure you are better informed before you enter a relationship and shortly after you've found a Dominant to submit to so your question of what is expected of you can be answered as fully as possible.

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Don't Assume Submissive Means Sister: Calling Me Your Sub Sister May Be a Bit Much

We are all people, submissive or not. Just because you identify as submissive does not give you a membership card into the friendship club for me. Sure I'm going to care for you with the same care I give any person I meet. Just don't expect me to care more because you are submissive. This isn't always a dog eat dog world, but you can't expect people to always treat you the way you treat them.

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Series

Novice Submissives Start Here

Newness doesn’t last long, so enjoy it. Love the exploration, the learning, the desires that seem to creep into every waking moment and fill every dream. Explore this collection of basics to your new submissive journey and pick up some much needed confidence that you are ready to take steps into the world of D/s.

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