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D/s Breakups

The breakup of a relationship is a difficult time for those involved. It is fraught with emotion and frustration. It makes it even more painful when the lines of trust are cemented like those in a D/s relationship. Likened to going through a period of grief you are sure to experience an array of feelings that can vary from fear, anger, rage, and denial. Seek comfort and help in the following articles.

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Topping from the Bottom

Topping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. Topping from the bottom is when you simultaneously adopt both roles. This could be in the form of giving commands, refusing requests or moving to control the location of impacts during play. Generally, it is frowned upon to try to force the Dominant’s hand to do something they do not wish to do.

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Personal Grooming

If you are still using the same personal grooming routine that you did when you were 7 then it’s time to upgrade your bathing and skin care, as well as learn new ways to do your makeup, take care of your hair and take care of your body.

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Setting Goals

No matter how you go about it, setting realistic goals and then working towards success is a step by step process. You have the tools available to make changes in your life if you want them. It doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Treat them like anything else in your life worth doing and you can make it. Use the resources below to make the progress stick.

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Service Submission

Service. It’s something that a lot of submissive say they are into giving. While it’s quite clear that the definition means that we are helping or doing work for someone, performing a kindness or favor, when we apply that term to D/s it tends to take on a more indepth role. Let’s explore some of the ways service submission exists in D/s relationships.

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Bondage

Bondage is the practice of consensually tying, binding, or restraining a partner for erotic, aesthetic, or sensory stimulation. Rope, cuffs, bondage tape, self-adhering bandage, or other physical restraints may be used for this purpose.Bondage itself does not necessarily imply sadomasochism. Bondage may be used as an end into itself, as in the case of rope bondage and breast bondage. It may also be used as a part of sex or in conjunction with other BDSM activities.

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Simply Service e-Zine

One of the hidden jewels on this site is an e-Zine that ran on Yahoo Groups back when I first started exploring submission. It has since stopped production but the articles it contained are still valuable and worth a read so I thought I ‘d bring them back to the forefront. They’ve been archived here with the editor’s permission since the site was first created but I don’t think many of you know just how wonderful they are. I encourage you to check them out!

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The Art of Slavery

it's not a bad book. I would have liked to see more essays and the poetry was unnecessary. It's not one I would say has to be on everyone's bookshelf because you just don't glean that much out of it. Those of us how have to read everything possible than it's good to have, but I'd recommend borrowing it before spending the money on your own copy.

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Where I Am Led: A Service Exploration Workbook

It's organized quite well and I haven't found a single page that isn't worth my time and energy to think about.

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When Play is No Longer Play: Recognizing Abuse in a BDSM Relationship

I am going to tell you, on no uncertain terms that if your dominant is hurting you out of anger this is abusive.

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