What Do Female Dominants Desire in a Male Submissive?

Do dominant women like this, that or the other thing? Unfortunately, there is no one set of ideal submissive traits that can be emulated. Indeed, if you ask these questions of twenty different Dominas, you’ll get at least twenty different answers. Each Dominant has her own idea of what makes a perfect submissive or slave. Some like youth and physical fitness, others like maturity and experience, tall or short, eloquent or not-so-much, pain slut or light-weight, sissy or not, emotive or the strong/silent type… well, as you can imagine, that list goes on and on. The problem, as I see it, is that too many (prospective) submissives get bogged down in trivial matters when they should be focusing on simple truth and sincerity.

Just Wait Till Your Father Gets Home: Telling Your Family

Normally I am very proud of my lifestyle choices and have no problem talking to anyone about the interesting and useful items that decorate my home. However, when my sister walked into my house I was literally at a loss for words.

Strengths and Misconceptions of Kajira

The Gorean lifestyle actually allows women to be women and men to be Men. I am a woman, quite categorically female and I am a completely different creature of the human species type to Men, I am softer in nature, more emotional, curvier and more able to love unconditionally. Gor allows me to be true to my nature and to myself.

The Female of the Species: Bisexuality and Identifying as Submissive

Playing with other girls can be great, but it works the best when everyone wants it to happen. Not just 2 out of the 3. I think there needs to be an attraction too, in whatever form it takes whether it's physical or something else or that added x factor. For me I enjoy it the most when I play with someone who I consider a friend and who I am comfortable with, so I think my advice for anyone wanting to explore this is that it's best to find a good friend first and see where it goes if an attraction develops just like any other relationship.

Are Female Dominants More About Mental Dominance Than Physical Dominance?

Since I’m writing from the male submissive point of view, I suppose this question might also be asked as, “Is male submission more mental than physical?” I find the question, no matter how you parse it, to be interesting largely because it’s something I never really considered before. I suppose the implied idea is that the female dominants somehow exert their control vis-à-vis more cerebral or psychological means whereas the men tend toward more physical means.

Some Thoughts on Domestic Service from a Male Submissive

When luna indicated that she was going to emphasize domestic service at the Sub Guide this month, it reminded me that when I tell people I am primarily a service submissive I am frequently asked: “What is that?”. The follow-up question is often, “What do you get out of that?” It seemed an opportune time to tackle these questions. (Sometimes the follow-up question is “What are you secondarily, then?” To which I always reply, “Whatever She needs me to be, of course.”)

So what is a service submissive? Simply put, it’s a sub (male or female) that takes care of household chores and similar tasks. Cooking, cleaning and other domestic duties might be performed by a service submissive. We essentially take the role of butler, maid, chauffeur, gardener or cook.

Acronyms, Abbreviations and Initialisms in BDSM Conversation

Oftentimes instead of writing out the words we abbreviate or create acronyms or groups of initials to say the same thing. Here is a list of the more common letter groupings when it comes to talking about BDSM and submission. These could also be seen in profiles and dating sites.

My Partner Is Hanging On to an Old Relationship

It is very difficult to lead somebody. Exponentially so when she answers to another.

Publicly Domesticated, Privately Dominated - Subtle D/s in Public

It can be difficult to achieve a public dynamic that fits the needs of all parties while remaining within the confines of public social expectations.