Is there any service out there that you can talk to a live person and go through some things that are fairly new to me in real time like right now... not necessarily the paid chat but just someone to ask questions and see if what I'm doing is normal...well somewhat normal.

Hi there!

I can understand your desire to talk to someone face to face about BDSM and submission and learning more about what you want and who you are. It's often overwhelming to learn these things about yourself and then be thrown to the wolves of the Internet to try to figure out what's right for you and what's wrong.

You don't need a service because there are likely support groups near you that you can attend and get your questions answered and perhaps make a few friends. These support groups are called munches and I've covered them a few times on the site in the past. A munch is a gathering of like-minded individuals in a public or semi public (think private room in a restaurant) place where you can chat and get to know people and learn about BDSM and D/s relationships from others who have more experience.

I have a small ebook called, "Your First Munch" and gives you a lot of information and answers questions about munches, from what to wear, how to act and where to find them. You might be interested in picking that up.

Now, if you want real-time, but still online, try FetLife groups. Some of them are so active that it's almost like real-time chat in some discussions because of how busy they are. The Novices and Newbies group is highly recommended for its helpful nature and the volume of help you will receive in a short time.

Good luck!

--lunaKM