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Content related to "The Control Book"

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Safewords Don't Automatically Mean You're Safe

There are lots of reasons and issues which propelled the existence of the Safe Word in the BDSM community. Many were quite valid and useful to distinguish the community from its ugly cousin ‘physical abuse’. The issue of consent being the bottomline.

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I’m a New Dominant, How Can Submissive Guide Help Me Understand My Submissive?

As time went on, I noticed that I was getting questions from Dominants in my email and praise from them for what their submissive has shared with them from the site. And so, I went on a little exploration of the site with new eyes. How would a new Dominant use Submissive Guide to learn and explore their budding relationship with a submissive?

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A Day in the Life

This series will present to you another submissive's typical day of service to their Dominant so you can walk in their shoes for awhile. It's fun to learn and grow and understand where others are coming from. Do you have a story to share? This series is an ongoing one - so please feel free to send me your Day in the Life stories.

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Adding Rules in a D/s (or M/s) Relationship

Adding rules to a dynamic, whether for the first time or continuing a list is not easy.

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Orgasm Control: Learning How to Ask for an Orgasm

In D/s sexuality one of the more common rules is that the Dominant controls the orgasms and sexual release of the submissive. Some require that the submissive not even touch themselves without the say so of the Dominant. In this style of power exchange it is familiar territory that the submissive will learn how to ask for an orgasm whether in or outside of a scene.

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The Impact of Pregnancy on Submission: Service and Play

When I found out I was pregnant, the first thing that crossed my mind was "oh no! How will my service be affected? How will my ability to be pleasing in bed and in kink be affected?" I was surprised when (at least for the first few months) that the answer was "It was not affected at all."

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Letting Go of the Bank Account - Submitting to Financial Control

Personally, I am not a very organized person and on top of that I'm lousy with numbers, always was, even in elementary school. If my check book was ever going to be balanced accordingly, someone else was just going to have to do it! Fortunately for my check book and I, my Dominant is better organized and more patient with a calculator, and even more fortunate for us he's very good at it.

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Is it Really a Bad Thing to be a Selfish Submissive?

I thought by not being selfish, I was going to be a better slave and I found out the hard way, that wasn’t true. You have to be selfish once and awhile to take care of yourself and to meet your own needs.

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Polyamory Resources From Around the Web

I hope people who are interested in exploring polyamorous relationships find this list of resources helpful.

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New to D/s Relationships? Here’s Your Foolproof Guide to Starting Out – Part 2

In part 2, you'll learn how to figure out what you need in a D/s relationship and what is expected of you within the blossoming relationship. It's all about what you want and need and getting as much of that as possible. Live happy. Don't settle.

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