The Formal Collar

The Formal Collar is offered by the Dominant with the intent to formalize the bond and attachment between themselves and their submissive. It is a recognition of commitment, deep emotional feelings, devotion, mutual respect, and consideration. It expresses a belief that the Dominant and submissive share similar ideals and a genuine and growing desire to share each other’s lives over perhaps the rest of their lives.

How to Revive Your Service When Protocol Becomes Boring

The pleasure I felt wasn't just sexual it was like a part of my soul was finally being satisfied. It didn't last. After a few months, I started to feel less happy about my protocol. It felt less like bliss and more like a chore. I had lost the attachment to WHY the protocol was in place, to begin with; the reminder of my place in the relationship. The honeymoon period was over. Things got really rocky in our relationship because the effort involved in doing the protocol got more and more difficult for me, and the stress he experienced was just as bad.

Honest Communication or Bust

"Full transparency" isn't just something we bat around on BDSM forums. And it's not necessarily something exclusive to the master/slave or owner/property dynamics. It's actually sort of important in any relationship, regardless of dynamic, or lack thereof. It is the key to "making it work". And it's best to start in the beginning.

I didn't start until what was almost the end. I wasted the first six years of our relationship telling him what I thought he wanted to hear. I thought it was my duty. My responsibility as property.

Understanding Your Body's Responses During Play

When you engage in playtime with a Dominant your body is the canvas for sensation and pleasure. You can run the gamut of emotions and many of them can take you by surprise. It's not uncommon even for someone who plays regularly to be shocked by a new reaction to a play activity that they have experienced before. This goes beyond the bruising, scratching and other physical results of play. Here are just a few of the more common reactions to play.

Adult Children of Alcoholics and Submission

Reading Dr. Jan’s book really opened my eyes, and it is my hope that by sharing this information, those who relate can begin to work through some of these traits and break out of the binds of the past and explore the future where anything is possible. I would personally recommend talking to your Dominant about this and decide upon what the next step will be. A few things to remember is that you can do it, you can get help, and you are not alone.

Kink and Mental Health: Temporary Relief

I won't pretend kink's a magic cure-all, and I sure as hell won't suggest it's a cure for OCD, but it does help mine when it comes to M.

Busyness, Why Do We Think It Adds Value?

I've come to see that oftentimes we slaves measure our value as slaves according to the accomplishments of other slaves and attempt to match the productivity level of other slaves that we look up to.

How I Started a Simple BDSM Protocol, and How You Can Too!

Protocol isn't lovely to see because it's complex, it's lovely to see because it takes something so simple and makes it special.

Obedience: A Covenant of Submission

My obedience is my word; it is my bond; it is my reputation; it is my name. There truly is no submission for us without obedience; this is how we show we are who and what we say we are. I would like to share a few pearls/pointers gleaned.