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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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BDSM Myths

The world is full of false truths. These false truths tend to be the assumptions of the uninformed or the beliefs of those who want to scare novices out of their wits. Many of these are because of a narrow view of the world or an inability to accept varying viewpoints. In this series, you’ll find some of the most popular BDSM myths that novices hear and what the truth really is.

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Why “Pleasing Him” Isn’t Always Good Enough

"To please him." Sure it's a selfless response, but is it always the best answer and perhaps not the most honest? I'm going to talk about why I think we need to reflect on the question more before we consider the auto-response to be the true and valid one for our personal submission.

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Is Your Heart Truly In It? - Fulfilling Submission Needs Desire

Submission does not have to be full-time. It doesn't even have to be in the same room. But it does have to fill a need inside of you and when done right should fill you up and reaffirm your choices.

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Conquer Me Book Club - Week 3

You've finished the book! I definitely want to know what you thought about it in the comments.

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Jealousy and Mono/Poly Relationships

Here's what has helped Mina learn about jealousy in a mono/poly relationship - it just might help you too.

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What Should I Try Next: Like Role Play? Try Medical Play!

A great way to push the envelope in role play is by trying out medical play. Medical play lends itself so easily to BDSM. You can include bondage (stirrups, anybody?), massively amplify power roles (doctor taking advantage of patient is so taboo), and include new elements of sado-masochistic play.

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Learn How to Nourish Yourself, Your Relationship and Your Submission

Like anything else, one has to learn to go with the flow and take the highs with the lows. I hope that any beginners, and even those who are well experienced will continue the sometimes rocky journey despite the aspects of the lifestyle that can destroy and fully embrace the aspects of the lifestyle that can nourish it.

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The Emotional Side of Sub Drop and Why It Happens More In Committed Relationships

There is a more intense side of Sub Drop that gets very little attention because for each person it is different and describing how to recover can take many forms. If not cared for, you could go into depression just from one play session. The endorphins and other hormones released during play leave your body in such a way that it takes the time to rebuild the balance of hormones in your system. You could feel like you have a hang over or partied too hard the night before, you could feel lost and depressed for hours or days.

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Communicating While Submissive

Doms keep telling us that they’re not mind-readers, so we have to communicate. But it’s hard! Especially when it’s something they might not want to hear.

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