Sample Dominant/submissive Contract

The first of three contract examples from Mrs. Darling. This one is from her book, retelling her own submissive discovery tale, Darling Discovered. Feel free to use this contract as a template for what will or will not work for your relationship.

Learn to Accept Your Limitations: A Personal Lesson on Teamwork In The Dynamic

Having flaws doesn't make you a bad slave or submissive. Being aware of your limitations and accepting them is a strength and can give you a huge advantage and even prevent you from making mistakes down the line.

Why Writing a Letter To Your Past Self Will Help You When Your Struggling in Submission

Writing a letter to your future self is a common journaling practice to help you see how happy you are in the present moment, but the writing a letter to your past self is equally helpful.

Stop Apologizing: 5 Alternative Approaches to ‘I’m Sorry’

Most people say ‘sorry’ or ‘I’m sorry’ far too often. You’re probably aware of whether this is an issue for you. If you struggle with frequent apologizing, you may need to take a different approach to find ways to express what you really mean.

Honest Communication or Bust

"Full transparency" isn't just something we bat around on BDSM forums. And it's not necessarily something exclusive to the master/slave or owner/property dynamics. It's actually sort of important in any relationship, regardless of dynamic, or lack thereof. It is the key to "making it work". And it's best to start in the beginning.

I didn't start until what was almost the end. I wasted the first six years of our relationship telling him what I thought he wanted to hear. I thought it was my duty. My responsibility as property.

On Being Worthless: Consensual Humiliation and Slut Training

Hearing a term like "worthless" can often be an emotional experience. However, in the context in which I use the term, "worthless," to describe myself in my place as Master's slave, it has a very different feel. In this context, "worthless" does not mean that I am unvalued, or that I do not matter to Master.

Finding My Submissive Focus With a Mantra

If you think that a personal mantra would be a great way to help you keep yourself in the proper submissive mindset, I encourage you to speak with your owner to come up with one that works for you.

I Am Submissive--Hear Me Roar!

Until I discovered my submissive self, I always found myself deferring to others as much as possible to avoid conflict. Suddenly I started standing taller, with my shoulders back and my head up.

The Day I Stopped Rejecting Compliments and Learned to Love Myself

How can someone accept their body and learn to love the way their partner looks at them, touches them and takes pleasure in their nudity? I learned to accept compliments.