There are lots of reasons and issues which propelled the existence of the Safe Word in the BDSM community. Many were quite valid and useful to distinguish the community from its ugly cousin ‘physical abuse’. The issue of consent being the bottomline.
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After a few months of "bonding" over rope bondage, though, I'm pretty convinced it's a whole different animal. Perhaps there is something to be gained from regarding it as such.
Read The Article | Find SimilarDiscipline comes in all shapes and sizes.It is a part of molding a submissive’s behavior and making corrections when they step out of line. Punishment though is a different beast. Punishment is for very severe infractions. I consider this to be things that could be deal breakers or relationship-enders. Punishment of this caliber should be rare or not at all. These differences are discussed and explored in the following series.
Read The Series | Find SimilarNot long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.
Read The Series | Find SimilarIf you’ve just started out in BDSM and have asked a few questions, it is very likely that you have been directed to use a checklist to become familiar with what you may or may not like in play and roles and fetishes.A checklist can be very helpful for you when you are first starting out. You can learn what you might like to try and get answers to things you don’t know about. Some of the more detailed checklists can seem overwhelming but please realize that you don’t have to like everything. Pick and choose and be honest.
Read The Series | Find SimilarIn all BDSM exchanges, there is a level of consent and negotiation that happened prior to the activity or relationship. This also includes punishment.
Read The Article | Find SimilarQuestion is can you explain why she might throw up like that and what was going on for her - she is fine the next day and wanting to do it again -
Read The Article | Find SimilarLet me describe to you what a first scene might be like.
Read The Article | Find SimilarI hate lying to him but I don't feel like I had a choice. I don't know what to do.
Read The Article | Find SimilarThe only true limitations are those fundamental values that you carry at your core. The inviolate lines that you will not cross for to do so you believe would compromise who you believe yourself to be. That final line in the sand.
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