As a submissive, one of the first things you will be asked by almost every Dom/me is: what are your limits? You will encounter this sometimes in chat, in play, and when negotiating a relationship with a new Dom/me. If you are playing with a new Dom/me and aren’t asked this question, my advice is not to play with the person. I have heard Dom/mes say that They don’t play with safe words or limits because They know what They are doing. How can a Dom/me know if you have health issues or triggers or are just plain terrified of something unless you tell them?
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If you believe yourself to be a sexual submissive then I urge you to become comfortable with who you are and not try to force yourself to fit into any other person's idea of what you must be.
Read The Article | Find SimilarChris Lyon has written a fantastic book that does a great job describing and detailing the two roles of a leading and supportive relationship without all the kink, discipline and fetish mumbo jumbo that tends to muddy our understanding when we get involved in BDSM.
Read The Review | Find SimilarFor me, there will always be limits. I can see when a slave says they honestly don't have any limits they truly believe that they don't. And it very well could be the case. But turn around and talk to the Dominant and they will be able to list things that they would never do with their property - be it because they don't get off on it or because they value their property enough to not want to harm them. This for me is why no limits slavery does not exist.
Read The Article | Find SimilarApplying limits to your BDSM experience is necessary for negotiation purposes in play and in relationships. It's like a compatibility scale. The more items on the limit list that match the more likely you are to be compatible and have fun playing in the same way. Being a novice isn't a hindrance for everyone, some Dominants like to help a novice explore their limits.
Read The Article | Find SimilarI had a question sent to me the other day asking for suggestions and strategies that a novice submissive could use to make sure they don't break the rules while they are still learning which sparked this topic for me.
Read The Article | Find SimilarWhether dominant or submissive, we have been shaped by our pasts. Many of us take the messages we heard in our childhood, into our adult lives and still believe these terrible things about ourselves.
Read The Article | Find SimilarDiscovering limits is almost as innocuous and confusing as exploring the kinks and fetishes we do want to play with.
Read The Article | Find SimilarWhy some ill-experienced Dominants only seek novice submissives and how you can protect yourself from them.
Read The Article | Find SimilarAs in most things, the meaning of consent is far from simple.
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