Question: How can I help my Dominant when they are in Dom Drop? What about if we both drop at the same time? Answer: A common conversation in BDSM circles is sub drop but rarely, if ever, is Dom drop discussed. It is a real thing and does happen! We focus so much on caring […]
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Full Question: How can I be a bratty submissive so that my Dom enjoys it without losing my submissiveness? Answer: Being a bratty submissive can be a challenge! Brattiness has a broad spectrum from the playful “uppity bottom” to the smart-ass masochist. A brat is a bottom who enjoys struggling against control or challenging the
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Question: My Dom disappoints me sometimes….how can I open up to him about it? Answer: It can be really hard to confront your Dominant when they’ve disappointed you in some way. As submissives, we can feel that raising concerns about our Dominant’s behavior isn’t allowed or at the very least, isn’t submissive-like. But in all
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Question: I am supposed to meet my 1st Dom tomorrow. Do you have any suggestions for me? Things to look out for to be safe or things to please him? Answer: Meeting a potential Dominant for the first time can be an exciting and anxious experience. For first dates, make sure you have basic information
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Question: I am still fairly new to this (six months). I love having Submissive Guide, but wish I could connect with other submissives in my area. Does anyone know how to find groups/gatherings? Answer: It’s going to require a bit of digging to find local groups and you should decide now how far you’re willing
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Full Question: I am in a long-distance D/s relationship. We normally just stick to a regular dynamic but he is coming to visit me in a few weeks and has said he wants to switch. I just want to know how far should I take things. He has said he wants me to punish him
My Dom wants me to switch with him, how do I do that? Read More »
Full Question: Can a little be a slave? How would this dynamic look different from a “normal” m/s dynamic? How would it look the same? Answer: Yes! This answer is for any submissive role, so if you aren’t a little or a slave you will hopefully learn a bit more about roles in BDSM. Roles
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Question: Why is everything about BDSM/kink sexual? I read a post on FetLife once stating that a play scene could absolutely be non-sexual, but of course, they didn’t give any examples. I have never seen a non-sexual scene. If non-sexual play is possible, then why is almost everyone naked (or close to it) at play
Are BDSM and kink always sexual? Read More »
Question: What is sub drop? How do I explain it to my partner? Answer: Great question! I think once you know what it is, you will be able to explain what it is to your partner, so let’s break it down. Sub drop is a physical and sometimes emotional crash after an intense play or
What is sub drop? How do I explain it to my partner? Read More »
Question: My partner and I are interested in starting a Dom/sub relationship. What are some things we should do beforehand? Answer: Welcome to the great big world of D/s! Creating a power exchange dynamic that suits your relationship will take time and I’m glad you are asking what you should set up before you start.
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Full Question: How do I please my Dom when I am on my period? Answer: I’m going to assume that you want to know about sexual pleasure and intimacy during your period, even though you don’t say so specifically in your question. All period-having people have asked this question at one time or another, so
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Question: How can I get my dom to stop buying me butt plugs? I know he loves me wearing them, but I already have close to 20 different ones. I’m not sure what to say as I feel that accepting them is part of the deal. He also buys me practical items for the home,
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Full Question: What are the differences between TPE and 24/7? Does it have to be TPE even if it’s 24/7? Answer: That’s a great question! Let’s start with some definitions. TPE, or Total Power Exchange, is a term coined and defined by Steven S. Davis in the mid-1990s, in the newsgroup “alt.sex.bondage” during his debates
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Full Question: Is it healthy to be addicted to subspace? Answer: The term “addiction” can mean many things to many people. For our purposes, we’ll define addiction as follows: Addiction is the repeated involvement with a substance or activity, despite the substantial harm it now causes, because that involvement was (and may continue to be)
Is it healthy to be addicted to sub space? Read More »
Question: As someone with anxiety, what are some good ways I can try to emotionally regulate myself when having strong feelings, so I don’t have to burden my Dominant with them all the time? Answer: According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA), over 40 million people have anxiety in the US. That’s
How can I regulate my anxiety, so I don’t burden my Dominant? Read More »
Question: How do we interact in front of our children (who are young adults) without them thinking I am a sap and He is a jerk? We know what we want, but how do we obtain it? Is there a trick to this lifestyle? I just feel like something is missing that we need to
Is there a trick to this lifestyle? Read More »
Full Question: I am going through a family crisis and went to my Dom saying that I’m feeling weak and don’t think I can handle any hard limits/lessons at this time. He got very upset and said he couldn’t turn his dominance off, and he couldn’t be my Dom till I was stronger…I’m a mess…I
Asked for a break due to a family crisis and my Dom left me Read More »
Question: I am new to submitting. I love it so far but I want some tips on what I can do to please my Daddy Dom, specifically in the bedroom. Any advice is helpful. Answer: “How do I please my partner?” is a very common question asked by just about every submissive at one time
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Question: Is it possible to list the different types of kinks to help the newer ones navigate? Answer: One of the best ways to get a list of kinks is to look for a BDSM checklist. Some of them are dozens of pages long and will list practically every common and some very uncommon kinks
Is it possible to list the different types of kinks to help the newer ones navigate? Read More »
Question: Is it wrong to call a safe word in a punishment I wanted in the first place? Answer: It depends on a lot of factors. First, are we talking about Punishment for a mistake or Funishment for playtime? These two terms get confused a lot, and they can have different interpretations. Once that’s clarified,
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