How can I regulate my anxiety, so I don’t burden my Dominant?

Question: As someone with anxiety, what are some good ways I can try to emotionally regulate myself when having strong feelings, so I don’t have to burden my Dominant with them all the time?

Answer:

According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA), over 40 million people have anxiety in the US. That’s almost twenty percent of the population. I know that trying to manage anxiety on your own, even with a supportive partner, can feel overwhelming. It’s okay to feel that way.

You’re also correct in being concerned about burdening your Dominant with your anxiety and uncontrolled emotions. Our Dominants want to help us, but sometimes it’s out of their league.

In this case, you should seek some professional help to relieve the added stress on your Dominant. Therapists will teach you positive coping skills for when you feel out of control. Sure, you could try to get a self-help book and go it alone, but a few good sessions with a therapist can do far more than you might imagine.

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Seeking therapy doesn’t mean you’re weak. You find professionals in other situations to take care of you when you can’t. There is no shame in talking with someone and helping you deal with whatever you’re experiencing. Brain health is just as important these days.

In the current world situation, services like BetterHelp.com will connect you with licensed therapists, and you can do therapy virtually from any phone or computer. They even work with your insurance, and the cost is affordable for most households. They aren’t sponsoring this response; I just feel strongly about helping people find professional therapy when that’s the right solution to their problem. 

I hope you learn the skills you need to help yourself.

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