There are lots of reasons and issues which propelled the existence of the Safe Word in the BDSM community. Many were quite valid and useful to distinguish the community from its ugly cousin ‘physical abuse’. The issue of consent being the bottomline.
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When I first think of transactional service I think of a business transaction. Someone pays you for a service and you provide that service. Transactional service for the submissive is very much the same. You do something for your Dominant and in return you get something.
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What makes ritual different from habit? What is a ritual at its core? And how can we conceptualize it? Such questions can fuel hours of discussion, reflection, and of course, cogitation.
Read The Article | Find SimilarLimits are personal boundaries that everyone places for how far they are willing to take things. These limits can be sexual, personal, emotional or otherwise. You may even have some for your every day that you don’t realize are limits. If you don’t have any BDSM experience, the idea of setting up limits can be challenging. Let’s dive into what they are, how to figure them out and why you make sure they are respected.
Read The Series | Find SimilarChris Lyon has written a fantastic book that does a great job describing and detailing the two roles of a leading and supportive relationship without all the kink, discipline and fetish mumbo jumbo that tends to muddy our understanding when we get involved in BDSM.
Read The Review | Find SimilarIf a Dominant approaches you and offers to be your mentor, make sure you clarify with them what you expect from them and for your own sake, keep it platonic. Your personal growth will be much improved and when that perfect Dominant comes along you'll be ready.
Read The Article | Find SimilarWe have to live with ourselves and understand that being in the lifestyle doesn't make us dumb or up for anything anyone wants us to do. We have outside lives, families and jobs that we have to show up for. So when thinking about that slave tattoo, slut on your right butt cheek or a dildo wrapped around your leg tattoo remember how do you want to represent yourself to the world.
Read The Article | Find SimilarA safe call is something that you may never need to use but should be there anyway. Like car insurance. It's there in the case of an accident. It's not like you plan on getting into an accident so you get insurance. It's the other way around. A safe call is your backup plan, your safety net. In fact, it could very well save your life. Are you in good hands?
Read The Article | Find SimilarWas it a matter of respect the Dominant thought they had earned? Was it a matter of protocol? What really was the issue behind not wanting to say that 3 letter word to a Dominant?
Read The Article | Find SimilarSome of the best online reading on the topic. Browse the list, watch the videos and learn more about pain play.
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