Did you know that how you see the world isn't what makes your life positive or negative, it's how you interpret your life's events that can turn the glass half full to half empty? Your skill in interpreting events and experiences for better or worse lies in your hands.
Oftentimes as submissives we tell ourselves that we aren't a good submissive, or that we didn't earn whatever good favor that our Dominant gave us. We are very hard on our lives and the experiences we gain. How many times have you told yourself that you could have gone further in play or taken more strikes with the wicked stick? If only just to please your Dominant? Or you are at the end of the relationship and you tell yourself that you weren't good enough or develop a case of the "if only's"?
Take a look around you; you really do have plenty of examples of people who have had bad things, terrible things happen to them in their lives and yet they have chosen to interpret these events in a positive light. You may not be able to choose the facts of your past but you can choose how you interpret them.
A Personal Story
I'm a product of a broken home and an abusive relationship with my father. For many years I used that as an excuse for my failures and my inability to attract and keep friends, my withdrawn nature, and my drive to impress every teacher I ever had just for attention. During that time I used the abuse I suffered and the difficult living situation as a crutch and viewed it very negatively. I decided I would never amount to anything.
As I matured and moved away from home and the childhood I once knew I realized something about myself, and that's where the lesson is taking you today. I could continue to look at my past with negativity or I could find the positive about it. What good came out of my life that I can make use of? I'm compassionate to others, I easily sympathize with a lot of difficult life experiences. I'm driven and focused on helping others and making sure that people know that help is available. For myself and my submission, I don't give up easily - difficulties are meant to be overcome. You can do it too.
Try it for yourself. Choose an event in your life that brings you down or makes you unhappy just thinking about it. Now, decide on two new endings, for example, a good overcomes adversity or a comedy, and rewrite this part of your life story. You have the power to change how you interpret your life.
What happens if you only think of the worst? The worst happens. It certainly shows that you're in control in bringing about the desired outcome that you focus on. So if you focus on something bad happening it likely will. What if you simply switched the way you think?
Try It Yourself
For the next week interpret as many events and experiences in your week positively. Even when it's hard, think positive. Keep track of the outcomes and more importantly, how this new approach leaves you feeling.