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Content related to "Finding Your Way to a Genuine Self"

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Discipline and Punishment

Discipline comes in all shapes and sizes.It is a part of molding a submissive’s behavior and making corrections when they step out of line. Punishment though is a different beast. Punishment is for very severe infractions. I consider this to be things that could be deal breakers or relationship-enders. Punishment of this caliber should be rare or not at all. These differences are discussed and explored in the following series.

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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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BDSM Checklists

If you’ve just started out in BDSM and have asked a few questions, it is very likely that you have been directed to use a checklist to become familiar with what you may or may not like in play and roles and fetishes.A checklist can be very helpful for you when you are first starting out. You can learn what you might like to try and get answers to things you don’t know about. Some of the more detailed checklists can seem overwhelming but please realize that you don’t have to like everything. Pick and choose and be honest.

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Start Here: New to BDSM Pack

So, you’ve discovered this great big world of BDSM and you just don’t know what to do now. Welcome! I suggest you start here in learning some of the vocabulary you’ll find around the internet and I want to help you get your head around all the things you’ll encounter, just a bit at a time.

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Series

BDSM vs Abuse

The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.

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Simply Service e-Zine

One of the hidden jewels on this site is an e-Zine that ran on Yahoo Groups back when I first started exploring submission. It has since stopped production but the articles it contained are still valuable and worth a read so I thought I ‘d bring them back to the forefront. They’ve been archived here with the editor’s permission since the site was first created but I don’t think many of you know just how wonderful they are. I encourage you to check them out!

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Real Life vs. Online, the Battle for Understanding Both Styles of Relationships

Online is no substitute and you can’t learn all that there is to know about living this life from essays and forums. You have to experience it to truly know. Every journey is different but I am grateful for my online VT beginnings.

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Submission is a Choice That Will be Tested

Submission is a choice. Being a babygirl might be part of my personality. Being a submissive might be something that comes naturally to me. But submitting to the desires of our Dominant is always a choice.

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Afraid of Not Being Me Anymore: Transformation Without Fear

Becoming submissive does not mean you stop being who you are now. All of my advice has always been that you should be you, just a better you.

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The Importance of Being Authentic

It’s so important as an s-type to be authentic. If you want to submit, if you want to serve, those desires have to come from the heart. I know it’s not always easy to be as authentic as we would like, but it’s something we must keep striving for.

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