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The Formal Collar

The Formal Collar is offered by the Dominant with the intent to formalize the bond and attachment between themselves and their submissive. It is a recognition of commitment, deep emotional feelings, devotion, mutual respect, and consideration. It expresses a belief that the Dominant and submissive share similar ideals and a genuine and growing desire to share each other’s lives over perhaps the rest of their lives.

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What Do Female Dominants Desire in a Male Submissive?

Do dominant women like this, that or the other thing? Unfortunately, there is no one set of ideal submissive traits that can be emulated. Indeed, if you ask these questions of twenty different Dominas, you’ll get at least twenty different answers. Each Dominant has her own idea of what makes a perfect submissive or slave. Some like youth and physical fitness, others like maturity and experience, tall or short, eloquent or not-so-much, pain slut or light-weight, sissy or not, emotive or the strong/silent type… well, as you can imagine, that list goes on and on. The problem, as I see it, is that too many (prospective) submissives get bogged down in trivial matters when they should be focusing on simple truth and sincerity.

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Why Writing a Letter To Your Past Self Will Help You When Your Struggling in Submission

Writing a letter to your future self is a common journaling practice to help you see how happy you are in the present moment, but the writing a letter to your past self is equally helpful.

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The Concept of Ritual in D/s Relationships

What makes ritual different from habit? What is a ritual at its core? And how can we conceptualize it? Such questions can fuel hours of discussion, reflection, and of course, cogitation.

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Accepting 24/7 D/s as a Real Relationship Style

No one can live 24/7 D/s. I hear it a lot. These people say that life gets in the way and you can't be Dominant and submissive all the time. The people that say they can't lead a 24/7 life always throw excuses in the mix. I beg to differ. It's a matter of setting priorities.

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Keeping D/s Alive Through Engagement and Marriage

I feel bad that sometimes lately I have forgotten I am marrying my Master and not just the man I love. There have been things we have been doing however to keep the D/s active.

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Submission in Marriage - Shifting from Husband and Wife to Dominant and Submissive

Sexual exploration and adventurousness can happen at any time in a couple's life; and even more so once they are committed to living their lives together for a long time. One of the ways that I've seen couples explore their sexual selves is by adding an element of D/s to the marriage.

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What's That Sound? Discreet BDSM Play and Hiding Toys from Children

Taking precautions when it comes to the noises that can come from play when you have kids in the home.

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Sub Drop From Afar: Managing Sub Drop in a Long Distance Relationship

If you are in a long distance relationship, this becomes an even more pressing topic of conversation if you are still participating in intensive play.

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Self-Esteem/Grooming Series Concludes: Accepting Comments and Compliments

Simply put, our ability to graciously accept compliments, and to positively disregard negative comments, can tailor the way that people interact with us.

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