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Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner

To open a dialog, communicate with your partner to understand what potential there may be, if any, for BDSM to be included in your relationship.

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Introducing BDSM to Your Partner

It is a scary proposition to approach your partner who may be oblivious to your new desires about wanting to add a bit or a lot of kink to your relationship. Whatever they decide it’s up to you on how you proceed. If they want to give it a try – go ahead! If they are far from interested you still have avenues available to you. It doesn’t automatically mean the end of the relationship.

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Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner: Part 2- My Partner is Not Interested

What do you do if your partner isn’t particularly interested? There are two types of this situation: A) your partner is not interested but seems willing to take part in some way though only as a way to give you some of what you need and B) your partner is not interested in participating.

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Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner: Part 3- My Partner is Interested!

Your partner has reacted to the revelation of your BDSM desires in a positive way or at least is willing to participate. Congratulations! This is a huge first step.

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I'm Ready to Get Kinky, How Do I Talk To My Partner?

I am not satisfied with my boyfriend. I don't know how to go about telling him, I want to be dominated.

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Getting Over Your Fears to Talk About Your Newfound Kinky Desires

Once you know why you are afraid to talk to your partner you can work to relieve that stress because communication is so very important to your relationship. You can't control how they will respond, but at least you will be confident in your approach.

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Wants and Needs

Wants and needs are very important to any relationship. When you start to understand who you are as a submissive, it’s time to figure out what you are looking for in a relationship. The difference between wants and needs can be answered in one basic question. Is this something you can live without?

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Making Him the Dom of Your Dreams - Working With The Man You Have

Just because your partner got a little kinky that one time during sex does not mean they have a kinky bone in their body.

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Long Distance Relationships

Long distance relationships are still relationships that require a different approach to develop the same connection and intimacy. Sure, the physical contact is far less than a face to face relationship but for some people, a long distance relationship is a smart first step or only step if you are unable to explore BDSM in any other way.

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Sex

Often enough, sex is involved in some form when you engage in BDSM play. But what if you don’t have a large repertoire? Let’s learn about the many varieties of sex and sex play from orgasms and anatomy to anal play and blow jobs. And everything else you can think of!

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