This is a guest post by Elle. I was inspired to write this article by the recent series about submissive journalling. I found myself wanting to get back into journaling, yet still holding back. This is a personal account of what can happen when journalling goes wrong. In my case, it was when I became […]
Dear Submissive Guide, How do I find a Dom? I know I want to be a sub, but I’m lost. I don’t know how to find a Dom and live the way I want to. Sincerely, Looking for a Dom Hey there! You’ve asked a question that every single submissive asks themselves at some point:
How Do I Find a Dominant? Read More »
from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 9-10-16 The topic for this article came to me from a reader survey I did over a year ago where I asked you what was most pressing to your at that moment and this question, “must I always wait for my Dom to tell me what to do?” came up.
Must I Always Wait for My Dominant to Tell me What to Do? Read More »
Maintaining your role as a sub in the middle of a scene is pretty easy to do, but the conversion from situational submissive to full-time sub can present a number of fairly interesting challenges as you settle into your full-time role. One of the strangest full time submitting challenges that I’ve found is dealing with
Submitting While One of You is Sick Read More »
At some point in our community participation we will come face to face with the question of poly vs. monogamy. Even if it’s a fleeting thought of wondering if either is better for our personal relationships, we’re still confronted with the possibility. I think that even in examining the possibility it can force us to
To Be or Not To Be – Poly, Mono, Mono-Poly Flexible Read More »
Hello SG, I’m struggling with a problem that has been following me for quite some time now. My Dominant and I have been through hell and high water, involving ‘light’ cheating (sexting each other, meeting up, but did not have sex) while I was away on holiday with family. This was almost a year ago. I
Regaining Trust – He Cheated and I’m Not Over It Yet Read More »
Ask a new parent, kinky or not, about their sex life, and they’ll probably say, “What sex life?” When you’re only getting a couple hours of sleep at a time or feeding a baby around the clock, sex is usually the last thing on your mind. While D/s relationships tend to have more communication about
BDSM and Kids: How Your Kink May Change Over the Years Read More »
With kids, it’s inevitable that they’re going to ask questions that make you want to curl up into a ball, cover your ears, and sing, “La-la-la, I can’t hear you!” This isn’t a kink thing, it’s a parent thing. However, as a kinkster, there’s a chance that, eventually, they’ll see or hear something and ask
BDSM and Kids: When Kids Ask Awkward Questions Read More »
When someone asks me how it’s possible to be kinky when you have kids, I know they’re imagining that it must be difficult to have a scene, enjoy kinky sex, or do anything remotely kinky as a parent. It’s not impossible to get kinky, but it requires creativity and discipline. It also depends on how
BDSM and Kids: Getting Kinky With Kids Around Read More »
As a submissive who has to interact with the outside world whether that’s work, family, or going to the grocery store, you already know that it can be hard to switch back and forth between roles and expectations. Frankly, after a long week of being my vanilla self, I’m exhausted, cranky, and usually feeling not-so-submissive.
BDSM and Kids: Handling the Role of Parent and Submissive Read More »
When I talk about my life as a kinkster, I talk about being a parent of two kids. It shocks a lot of people to know I’m in a 24/7 D/s relationship and a parent. A lot of people ask, “How can you be a parent and a submissive?” I always imagine there’s a bit
BDSM and Kids: Can You Be a Parent and a Kinkster? Read More »
Dear Submissive Guide, In May I met a wonderful Dom online. We talked on the phone every night and I was over the moon for him. He was the first to say I love you and my self-protect wall started to melt. In my dating profile, I was explicit about not wanting to relocate because
Help! My Dominant Says and Does Things I Didn’t Agree To Read More »
Dear Submissive Guide, I am a sub and I have an amazing Master. He is loving, caring, respectful and just everything a sub could ask for. He collared me 6 months ago and we moved in together 2 months ago. We get along great in every area so far. The problem is this, lately, I’ve
Things Have Changed and I Feel Insecure In My Relationship Read More »
Hi SG, I’m relatively experienced when it comes to submission. I’ve submitted in play to a number of delightful Dommes and pushed my boundaries nicely over the years. I’ve never had a long term D’s relationship, though. I’m just entering into a relationship with a lady who is highly sexed and thoroughly enjoying the power.
How Do I Help My Dom Give Me What I Need Read More »
Dear Submissive Guide, So, I am totally a newbie. I do have a Master but due to our personal/vanilla lives, it is limited & very part-time. My Master has not participated in the lifestyle for 12 years. My question is do you have any info on transitioning from submissive side back to my vanilla? We
Create a Transition: Moving Between D/s and Vanilla Lives Read More »
At the end of May, KnyghtMare’s long-term girlfriend broke up with him suddenly. He said he had no idea it was coming so it hit him really hard. I know that any time someone you love ends the relationship you go through a period of grief and loss and depression, but I’ve never experienced it.
Learning to Help a Partner Through a Poly Breakup Read More »
Dear Submissive Guide, Is it normal for your Master to want to play and have sex with others? Sincerely, Curious Dear Curious, I could give you the glib answer and say, “There’s no such thing as normal” but that doesn’t help you much, does it? Do some people, Dominant or submissive, want to have open
My Master Wants to Have Sex With Other People Read More »
This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. There is an almost universal level of acceptance for the ‘idea’ of one man or ‘Dominant’ having many or multiple partners or submissives. Such a Dominant may be considered to have prowess, charisma,
On Multiple Dominants Read More »
A couple years ago, the MR and I decided to renew our wedding vows. We had been through a rocky start to our marriage and had transformed since originally marrying from a vanilla, egalitarian relationship to a kinky, Dominant and submissive one, and finally we had arrived at Master and slave. We felt at home
Our Ceremony of Roses, Vow Renewal, and Re-collaring Read More »
We spend a lot of time in front of a screen these days. We chat, we shop, we explore and we date, all from the comfort of our homes. But, it is my opinion, that dating is something that really should be done face to face. Yeah, I know, I met KnyghtMare online and we
Meeting Someone Face to Face Is an Important Early Step in Online Dating Read More »
