Recently I heard something in the midst of a talk about obedience that just made me stop and really think for a moment – and I mean deep thought too! Delayed obedience becomes immediate disobedience; partial obedience is complete disobedience. Yes, my mind had to reflect on the matter of obedience. Honestly, I can’t say […]
Obedience: A Slavey Meditation Read More »
Whenever I frequent online groups, a common theme in them is telling the person asking a question to not be a doormat. Rarely do we ever get a description of what a doormat submissive is or how to prevent becoming one (or even if the person is actually a doormat submissive). There are many misconceptions of what
8 Ways You Might Be a “Doormat” Submissive and How to Stop Read More »
“She was afraid, however, that she hadn’t pleased him. She searched her mind for faults. She had obeyed all his commands, and he understood how difficult it was for her. He knew completely what it meant for her to be stripped naked and revealed to everyone, to be helpless and made public and that this
Am I Trying Hard Enough? Learning How to Make the Most of Your Inner Submissive Voice Read More »
Originally published April 9, 2011 on Fearless Press when I was a guest author there. From an early age, I would look into the mirror and see only the things I wish I could change; from the dimple in my chin, my growing belly and fat arms to my round face, huge jiggly ass. Then I didn’t
Seeing a Desirable Me: Learning Body Confidence through the Fingers of a Lover Read More »
“To err is human. To forgive is divine.” The start of a new year is a very popular time for resolutions and goals, but it’s also a great time for letting go of the past and letting bygones be bygones. In theory, it’s a great idea. Who doesn’t want a fresh start to the New
A Submissive’s New Year’s Resolutions: Letting Go and Offering Forgiveness Read More »
Every December as the holidays wane, we start thinking about New Year’s resolutions and ways to make our lives better. The New Year is a fresh start and optimism is contagious. For submissives, though, resolutions mean so much more. Frankly, I’ve decided that the world would be a better place if everyone had a Dom/me
A Submissive’s New Year’s Resolutions: Goal Setting in a D/s or M/s Dynamic Read More »
I’ve noticed a lot of questions in FetLife recently (and almost always) about how to maintain the mindset in a 24/7 relationship. I’ve not responded to these there because I’ve created this article as my reply. The advice that the people have received may or may not help them. My thoughts on the subject are
The Myth of the 24/7 Submissive Mindset (and Why So Many of Us Struggle) Read More »
Pride, Merriam-Webster: Pride is a slippery emotion that I believe many a slave deal with, even if we don’t recognize it. I’m not talking about the feeling of elation and accomplishment after a job well done or when we’ve been recognized and given kudos. But, there is this thing; this lapse in judgment that many
Note To Self: Selfish Pride Comes Before A Fall Read More »
When I first discovered my submissive side, Sir gave me a BDSM checklist to fill out. It was a spreadsheet over six pages long with categories such as sex, bondage, S&M, role-playing, and toys. The columns include basic yes/no/maybe options, as well as soft/hard limit and “only with Sir.” The list was so comprehensive and
A Submissive’s New Year’s Resolutions: Reviewing and Updating your Checklist Read More »
This is a guest post by kaya of Underhishand.com. For Master. When I used to say “Oh I want someone who can push me… who doesn’t stop when I say stop… who does what they want and aren’t guided by MY reactions”, I can honestly say that I never believed such a person existed. I
Accepting Fear through Obedience Read More »
I often get the question about how I can be submissive all the time, that I must have other responsibilities that should take precedence on occasion and submission is often turned off. I can understand where these questions are coming from but for me, submission isn’t what I do, it’s who I am. It’s much
Everyone Needs a Break, Right – Do you Break from Submission? Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Is your need to submit being met? If not, or if your situation changed, do you think that you could continue in your life and still be happy/content if you were never able to express your submission in the
30 Days of Submission: Day 30 – What Makes Submission Special? Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Is pain or humiliation (spankings for example) a part of your submission? What is your relationship to it? Do you embrace it as a part of your submission, tolerate it as necessary or have some other type of relationship
30 Days of Submission: Day 29 – BDSM in the Relationship Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Has your submission ever let you down? Have you ever been criticized for your submission? Have you ever regretted being or feeling submissive in a moment or in a relationship? Have you ever looked back and realized you made
30 Days of Submission: Day 28 – Negativity about Submission Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Do you have submissive desires or fantasies that you have yet to be able to explore? Do some of your desires confuse or frighten you? Do they excite you? I have sexual fantasies but I have to say that
30 Days of Submission: Day 27 – Fantasies Waiting Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! What are the qualities you seek in a dominant partner and why? Are some qualities deal-breakers as in “must” haves or “must not” have? When I was looking for a Dominant I wasn’t really sure what I was looking
30 Days of Submission: Day 26 – Qualities of My Ideal Dominant Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Are there items, objects or rituals that represent or help you express submission? If not, have you ever thought of adding or being gifted one? Is there a special significance to these objects or rituals? My relationship is full
30 Days of Submission: Day 25 – Rituals of Submission Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! What are the emotions that most directly let you access submission? What feelings do they inspire? I really had to think about this one for awhile because I feel my submission isn’t an emotion and doesn’t need to be
30 Days of Submission: Day 24 – Emotional Connection to Submission Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Is there anything about submission (yours or what you see in others) that you question, dislike or repels you? Was there a time you questioned or were resistant to your own submissive feelings? Wow. I spent a good long
30 Days of Submission: Day 23 – Questioning my Submission Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Can you feel submissive without a dominant partner? If so, how does your submission express itself? If not, how do you handle your submission or submissive feelings? I do believe that you can feel submissive without a Dominant but
30 Days of Submission: Day 22 – Submission without Domination, is it possible? Read More »
