From understanding basic kink concepts to exploring various fetishes, this category is your starting point for building a solid foundation in the world of BDSM.
Last week, we heard from Kayla Lords in a week-long series about how to enter your local BDSM community. Here’s a link to the first post in that series. But what if you can’t find it or would like to start one of your own? I recently wrote about the difficulties some new BDSM community members […]
How to Start A New Local BDSM Group Read More »
I’m devoting this Monday to meditation, reflection and devotion to submission. I hope to select topics that will get you thinking differently about some part of your life or submission and then just maybe grow a little bit further. If you have ideas for topics that might work for a Meditation Monday, please email me. In the first
Igniting Sexual Desire – Submissive Mediation Monday Read More »
Welcome to part five in this week’s series all about how to help you feel more comfortable entering and becoming a part of the local BDSM community. Some of the best education I’ve received as a submissive, especially on the different ways other people live the D/s life, have been from people in my local area . Attending a
Welcome to part four in this week’s series all about how to help you feel more comfortable entering and becoming a part of the local BDSM community. Some of the best education I’ve received as a submissive, especially on the different ways other people live the D/s life, have been from people in my local area . Attending a
Entering the Community: Who You’ll Meet and What to Expect at a Munch Read More »
Welcome to part three in this week’s series all about how to help you feel more comfortable entering and becoming a part of the local BDSM community. Some of the best education I’ve received as a submissive, especially on the different ways other people live the D/s life, have been from people in my local area . Attending a munch,
Entering the Community: Understanding and Following General Protocols in Public Read More »
Welcome to part two in this week’s series all about how to help you feel more comfortable entering and becoming a part of the local BDSM community. You might like to read the previous post about using online resources to find kinksters. Some of the best education I’ve received as a submissive, especially on the different ways other
Entering the Community: The Different Ways to Socialize with Local Kinksters Read More »
Welcome to the first part in a series I hope will help you feel more comfortable entering and becoming a part of the local BDSM community. Some of the best education I’ve received as a submissive, especially on the different ways other people live the D/s life, have been from people in my local area.
Entering the Community: Finding Other Local Kinksters Using Online Resources Read More »
I used to struggle with my sexual orientation. Well, that’s not entirely true. I used to never think about my sexual orientation. I was always attracted to cis males (a male assigned male at birth) and never once felt an attraction to anybody but that. Until I did. It is quite a shocking experience to question your
On Being Pansexual Read More »
I logged onto Fetlife one early Friday morning with a steamy cup of joe and saw this message straight away: I was there last night but didn’t get out of my truck. I was still in my work clothes and didn’t really know how to find you guys. Maybe I’ll try again next month. As
Tips For Those Struggling to Enter the Local BDSM Community Read More »
I know for myself, some of the most embarrassing things my Dominant has asked me are actually quite tame. One of the early ones was masturbating in front of him. Sure I’d been doing it on camera for him for months but having him sit there in the room, within touching distance, was a whole
He Wants to Watch: How to Share Your Masturbation Sessions With Confidence Read More »
This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Subspace – This term generally is used to describe a moderate to deep trancelike condition experienced by persons in the submissive position in a D/s relationship during interaction with the person in the
Defining Sub Space Read More »
Getting back into BDSM is harder than getting into it in the first place. This sounds counterintuitive – you know the safewords and one another’s fetishes, you’ve done your research, you just took a little break. Turns out that little break for a few months actually has a major impact on your kink relationship. For
Getting Back Into The Game: Returning to Kink After a Break Read More »
A common misunderstanding that people who are new to the scene seem to have is that kink and sex are indistinguishable from each other: if something kinky ensues, something sexy is sure to follow. The reality is, however, that the two can, and sometimes should be separated. This is especially true if the participants in
When Kinky isn’t Sexy Read More »
This is another post in the series about a submissive’s perspective in play. This one is on canes and caning, but I’ve also written on gags, spanking, flogging and rope bondage. My first exposure to canes was that of some amateur porn I stumbled across and it made me so terrified of canes that I vowed never to experience them.
Perspectives: Canes Read More »
Hi luna, My Sir has tasked me with researching and carrying out CBT. I have no experience with it and am looking for a how-to. Honestly I’m afraid of hurting him and need to be confident when this happens…maybe watch a video so I know what to expect? I have found some information; do you
Resources For CBT (Cock and Ball Torture) Read More »
This is a guest post by Mina Button. The idea of wearing a butt plug outside the bedroom is exciting. It shows up in lots of erotica, especially in connection with the idea of “anal training,” where a submissive learns to open their ass for their Dominant. It has the potential to be really hot,
Wearing Butt Plugs Longer: Training for Pleasure Read More »
Sub space is one of the big topics I cover here on the site. So much of what we know about it shifts and changes with our experience that I’m always learning more about how it affects people and what draws people to reaching that sensation in play. If you don’t know, part of why
The 5 Levels of Sub Space In and Out of Playtime Read More »
Vagina. Pussy. Cunt. Twat. Poochy. Whoo-ha. Down there. We have a ton of words for the vagina, but the average person knows very little about this aspect of the human anatomy, which is pretty amazing considering how integral it is to your day-to-day life. So I figured that I would write an overview of information
A Discussion of Anatomy: The Vagina Read More »
This past winter I ran an educational event through the campus Women’s Center on BDSM in response to Fifty Shades of Grey. With the movie coming out I knew that people would be interested in the topic and consider trying it themselves and I wanted them to be safe about it. I covered the basics
Coming Out As Kinky: Food for Thought Read More »
I have heard it a thousand times, someone doesn’t like pain so they are not interested in BDSM. In practically every case the person making that statement retracts it once they find out how erotic some pain can be. Pain doesn’t have to be painful, and other stimuli can be pleasurable and can either mask
But I Don’t Like Pain! Learning to See the Eroticism in Pain as Pleasure Read More »
