Question: How can I get my dom to stop buying me butt plugs? I know he loves me wearing them, but I already have close to 20 different ones. I’m not sure what to say as I feel that accepting them is part of the deal. He also buys me practical items for the home, […]
How can I get my dom to stop buying me butt plugs? Read More »
Question: Is it possible to list the different types of kinks to help the newer ones navigate? Answer: One of the best ways to get a list of kinks is to look for a BDSM checklist. Some of them are dozens of pages long and will list practically every common and some very uncommon kinks
Is it possible to list the different types of kinks to help the newer ones navigate? Read More »
Question: Am I too late to join the BDSM community and find a Dom as I am in my sixties and overweight? Answer: It’s never too late to embrace your sexuality or explore what interests you. People discover BDSM later in life a lot more than we admit. You can’t age out of BDSM. I’ve
When it comes to books, as well as bondage, I’m more of a leather-bound girl, myself. So, when my Master decided to start practicing rope bondage, I used this background as my comparison. After a few months of “bonding” over rope bondage, though, I’m pretty convinced it’s a whole different animal. Perhaps there is something
The Time Between Knots: Changing Our Perspectives on Rope Bondage Read More »
If you’ve spent more than a few minutes researching BDSM, even just scrolling through Submissive Guide, you know that negotiation is one of the cornerstones. Negotiation and consent are the primary ways BDSM is distinguished from abuse – they are essential parts of kinky play. But far too many people gloss over how important it
The Importance of Safety, Risk-Awareness and Consent in Pre-Scene BDSM Negotiation Read More »
This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Please keep in mind that this article is now over 15 years old and some of the language may show their age. I feel it still opens a line of communication of a
Disabled? Ideas on How You Can Still Enjoy BDSM When Impaired Read More »
This is a guest post by Daniel A. of https://www.hypnoticdreams.com. Trance is a natural and essential part of sex. It always has been. The hypnosis fetish, however, is relatively new. And because of its newness, traditional submissives sometimes dismiss hypnosis as unnecessary or a cheat. But hypnofetishists have learned a lot about sex and relationships in the
What Traditional Submissives can Learn from Hypnosis Fetishists Read More »
When I first learned about BDSM, and then that I enjoyed pain play as a masochist, there was a moment when a Top that I had asked to play with asked me a very specific question, at least I thought it was specific at the time. “Stingy or thuddy?” Did I prefer, sting or thud
Be More Specific About Pain – When a Tool is More Than Sting or Thud Read More »
This is a guest article by Melissa Tilghman. BDSM is one of the best ways to spice up sex life! If you’re reading this post, you might have already completed the beginner’s guide to BDSM and know the whole shooting match. And as an experienced lady, you’d like to continue those sweet games in the bedroom despite
Tips and Suggestions for Safer BDSM Practices While Pregnant Read More »
This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Discipline – To teach or train, to make a convert of, more directly to make a disciple of. It is an action made in the interest of order, rule, or control. A disciple is
Discipline or Punishment – Which is it? Read More »
This is a guest post by the authors of Spices of Lust. In the world of BDSM, always be careful when someone says “true” or “right” when describing anything — because there is no one right way for anything. When we say we can help you find the “right” BDSM collar — we mean the right one for
How to Choose the Right BDSM Collar Read More »
It’s time for a celebration on the site! This year is Submissive Guide’s tenth anniversary! It’s going to be another great year here on the site and I’m ready to celebrate this milestone with you. Today we’re looking back at the top articles on the site but keep an eye on the site for further
Celebrate 10 YEARS of Submissive Guide With The Top 20 Articles of All Time Read More »
One of the more daunting prospects as a single kinky person or someone who is open to casual play is approaching others at a play party with whom you might be interested playing. It’s often called pick up play because you are simply trying to pick someone up for the purpose of play. Whether you
How To Find Someone to Play With at a Party and Other Negotiation Basics Read More »
This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Sometimes it feels like we have an overwhelming need for labels. Everything should nicely fit as if the world or the universe is a gigantic jigsaw puzzle and everything has its place
The False Comfort of Labels on Our Personal Identity in Kink Read More »
This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Dear Mistress, . . . One in particular that often bothers me, the impact of the Internet on the lifestyle or the type of people who suddenly “found themselves ” at the ripe
Born Again into Kink: Discovering Kink at Middle Age Read More »
This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. A sexual submissive is a person who manifests submissive traits only in direct connection with sexual arousal and release. In all other aspects of their life this person will probably comport themselves in
The Sexual Submissive Read More »
This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Long ago the first imagery appeared. In most cases we cannot pinpoint the moment or recognize it’s import in our life. When I was a child I went to the library every Tuesday
When Fantasy Collides with Reality: Weighing Expectations when Exploring Kink Fantasies Read More »
This is an article by chelgrrl. It was written quite some time ago, but the information is still sound advice for those exploring fisting today. I get a lot of responses when I say to people that I love to be fisted. Of course, there is the Fister, the person who does the fisting and
Vaginal Fisting: How You Too Can Experience a Hand in the Bush Read More »
I know how you feel right now. You’ve discovered this thing called BDSM in some fashion or another and it pulls you in to get it a try. But as you search through countless websites, Amazon BDSM book lists and the sheer number of opinions on BDSM you realize this barrage of information is going
3 Ways You Can Learn About Your Limits When You Are New to BDSM Read More »
This is a guest post by The Femdomist. Foot fetish is a stable of the BDSM community and touted as one of the most common fetishes. It’s hardly surprising: it’s a versatile fetish, with so many varieties and preferences. From passionate and loving foot massages to hardcore humiliation with dirty feet and foot cuckolding. The fetish
The Art of Foot Worship Read More »
