Full Question: I’m very new to The Lifestyle and have absolutely no idea where to start. I’ve done tons and tons of research but don’t know how to go from passively researching to actively participating. Do you have any advice on where to start? Answer: Starting to explore BDSM actively is never easy and can […]
Full Question: How to be more confident in BDSM when new? Answer: It can be hard to be confident in BDSM, no matter how much experience you have. But when you are new, I feel that confidence comes from a few places, and the good news is that you can work on all of them!
How to be more confident in BDSM when new? Read More »
My first experience of being kinky was in the bedroom when I asked my partner to tie me up and have his way with me. At the moment he emphatically said yes, I was hooked. Like me, you may find that exploring sexual submissiveness is a fun, exciting way to bring an element of power
A Beginner’s Guide to Sexual Power Exchange Read More »
Full Question: My question revolves around the idea of being a new sub and wanting desperately to act it out with almost anyone who will play the Domme. It’s a kind of frenzy. But as you grow into the role, how do you set sensible boundaries and have a code of honor and values so
How do you set sensible boundaries when you’re a new sub? Read More »
Full Question: I met someone online, and he opened up to me about BDSM and him being a Dom. I had never even heard of the term before. Almost a year later, I still have a lot of questions unanswered. He wants us to meet, and so do I, but I’m scared. He says that
I’m very new, should I slow down? Read More »
If you’ve spent more than a few minutes researching BDSM, even just scrolling through Submissive Guide, you know that negotiation is one of the cornerstones. Negotiation and consent are the primary ways BDSM is distinguished from abuse – they are essential parts of kinky play. But far too many people gloss over how important it
The Importance of Safety, Risk-Awareness and Consent in Pre-Scene BDSM Negotiation Read More »
I know how you feel right now. You’ve discovered this thing called BDSM in some fashion or another and it pulls you in to get it a try. But as you search through countless websites, Amazon BDSM book lists and the sheer number of opinions on BDSM you realize this barrage of information is going
3 Ways You Can Learn About Your Limits When You Are New to BDSM Read More »
This is part two of the guide to starting D/s relationships. If you missed part 1, you may want to go and read that first. In the previous article, we talked about how a relationship develops in basic terms, why it’s important to identify the mechanics and what more you can expect from a D/s relationship.
New to D/s Relationships? Here’s Your Foolproof Guide to Starting Out – Part 2 Read More »
My Dom and had our first experience with wax play a few months ago, and I wanted to share a few, quick, thoughts and bits of advice if you’ve been toying with the idea of adding wax to your toy chest. What is Wax Play? It’s a form of temperature play, where a special kind
Wax Play Review and Thoughts Read More »
New to D/s relationships? Learn how to define your needs, identify compatibility, and set the foundation for a successful BDSM dynamic with this beginner-friendly guide.
New to D/s Relationships? Here’s Your Foolproof Guide to Starting Out – Part 1 Read More »
New to BDSM and kinky roleplay? Get inspired with beginner-friendly scene ideas for exploring bondage, roleplay, and BDSM play in the bedroom. Perfect for first-timers!
It’s no secret that 50 Shades of Gray is a huge media success. It’s brought about fame for the author and attracted many people to the theaters to see the film adaptation. But it has also brought curious people to this site and many like it for answers and exploration. Many people first get introduced
Hi SG, I’m relatively experienced when it comes to submission. I’ve submitted in play to a number of delightful Dommes and pushed my boundaries nicely over the years. I’ve never had a long term D’s relationship, though. I’m just entering into a relationship with a lady who is highly sexed and thoroughly enjoying the power.
How Do I Help My Dom Give Me What I Need Read More »
In the first few posts about submissive journals you’ve read about the kind of tool a journal is in a relationship, whether that be a new one or a long-standing one, as well as how Dominants use your journal as a tool for communication and relationship building but what about when you are single, or
As a slave (who used to identify as a submissive, who used to identify as a masochistic bottom), I was a newbie at one time (yes, really!!). When I entered the lifestyle, I was wide-eyed, excited, and had a healthy dose of caution just days after learning that there was a word for the kinky
7 Things I Wish I’d Known When I Was New to BDSM Read More »
Dear lunaKM, I am a sub that is very new to the BDSM scene. I know a little bit, but I’m quite unfamiliar with a lot. Recently, I met someone online that immediately recognized me as a sub, and I would love to impress him. He asked me what my limits are, and what I’m
What are my limits? Read More »
Have you ever felt like you are all alone in this loud crowded world of kink? That the things you enjoy are uncommon. Or perhaps you have circumstances that govern how you play or what your relationships are like. It’s not that you are alone, not at all. The world of kink is huge and
Would really appreciate it if I could get some advice or your opinion on this ? I’ve always found that submission and being dominated really turns me on. That’s about the only thing I find sexually stimulating but my boyfriend doesn’t really know the extent of what I really like in the bedroom. I’m extremely
Are There Subtle Ways I Can Cue My Partner Into My Kinky Interests? Read More »
A common misunderstanding that people who are new to the scene seem to have is that kink and sex are indistinguishable from each other: if something kinky ensues, something sexy is sure to follow. The reality is, however, that the two can, and sometimes should be separated. This is especially true if the participants in
When Kinky isn’t Sexy Read More »
I was never formally introduced to the bdsm world but I have always found the thought of being controlled a extreme turn on. How do I know if being a submissive is the right thing for me? And if it is, what is the best way to go about entering the lifestyle? Dear Never Formally
How Do I Know If Submission Is Right For Me? Read More »
