Full Question: Tips for a new submissive going into the lifestyle with a Dom who is also new.
Answer:
What an exciting time! When you first embark on exploring BDSM and D/s relationships, there’s a lot of new information that is likely to overwhelm you. It can be difficult when you have so many questions and blanks in your mind, but give me a moment to explain how you can begin to fill in the void.
- Read everything. There is a ton of information online and in books that will keep you learning and expanding your knowledge on safe, consensual practices and healthy D/s relationships. SubmissiveGuide.com has several recommended reading lists and book reviews of educational materials for you to explore.
- Talk with your partner about what they want to explore. Open communication lines are super important. You may find that your openness and vulnerability will bring you closer together. That’s a great measure to know whether you are communicating successfully.
- Make a list of your interests, curiosity, and desires. If you need help, there are dozens of BDSM checklists online that you could use to help you, but don’t let them get you overwhelmed. They are intended to be really long and complete to follow you along with your entire BDSM experience.
- Try one or two things at a time. It’s better to do things slowly and sample instead of trying to do everything all at once. First, if you don’t like something, you’ll know exactly what that is instead of wondering if one of the other things you were also doing changed your perception of the activity.
- Find a community online or face-to-face so that you can ask questions and get support. FetLife.com is a great place to start looking for community.
These tips only scratch the surface! What tips would you give to a new couple in a D/s relationship? Leave your comments to help newcomers out!
