Whether you are a hard-core masochist or just a light explorer of sadomasochistic pain play there are always opportunies to experience more, push yourself harder and enhance your pain management techniques. How you learn to do this, and the techniques you employ are unique from submissive to submissive (masochist to masochist) – however there are […]
How To Manage, Increase and Explore Pain Tolerances in SM Play Read More »
As I mentioned in my introduction to this series, online submission is a bit of a hot-button among D/s practitioners. There are a lot of great arguments for why it doesn’t work, and for each of those, there’s an equally strong counterargument for why it’s a perfectly valid arrangement; but chances are, unless you’re submitting to
Submitting in a Long Distance Relationship: The Big Meet Read More »
This is the third in an ongoing series where I will be writing about key factors it takes to have a successful relationship. This third article is about the importance of trust and the role it plays in our relationships. Check out the previous articles – It’s All About Communication and Honesty is the Best Policy. I am
Keys to a Successful Relationship: Trust is Like a Mirror… Read More »
I’m here to break the news to you about a piece of misinformation about submissives. Are you ready? You do not have to like pain or be a masochist to be submissive. That’s it. That piece of news right there leads to one of the largest reasons so many of you are confused. You think
Take the Bite Out of Submitting to Pain – Sadomasochism Is Not a Part of Submission Read More »
I don’t know about you, but when I was a child, I didn’t always think it was all that easy. I remember grownups all around me telling me how “easy I had it” and to “just wait until I became an adult” because that’s when life would start getting hard. I would always look at
Daddy-Little Girl Dynamics: It’s Not Easy Being A Little Read More »
To say that communication is important in a relationship is like saying that man must breathe to live: one simply shouldn’t have to specify its importance. Yet somehow, although I have never heard of a person who died because he forgot how to breathe, I have seen many relationships fall apart due to a distinct
Developing Effective Communication in Long Distance Relationships Read More »
This essay was first written and published in the Society of Janus newsletter “Growing Pains.” I hope you enjoy! Pushing boundaries in pain tolerance is a common request for submissives of all flavors. As a masochist I enjoy pain for the sake of pain. I don’t always want to escape from it; rarely do I
Learning Better Pain Processing Through Visualization Read More »
There are several very good podcasts online that I enjoy listening to from time to time and I finally pulled together a short list of the ones that I don’t like to miss a single episode. What is a podcast you ask? And there really are adult kink-oriented podcasts? Why yes! A podcast is an
Recommended Podcasts for Kink and Power Exchange Relationships Read More »
This is an ongoing series where I will be writing about key factors it takes to have a successful relationship. This second article is about the importance that honesty plays in our relationships. The first one is It’s All About Communication I remember growing up, I always heard from the adults around me that honesty was
Keys to a Successful Relationship – Honesty is Really the Best Policy Read More »
You are a bedroom submissive. You may only submit only in the bedroom, or on weekends or for only set time periods. So having rituals seems foreign to you, right? Maybe. They aren’t meant for you, right? Wrong. If you’ve ever thought that ritual and meditation was for full-time submissives only or those in committed
Enhance Your Sex and BDSM Play with Rituals in the Bedroom Read More »
This post is part of an effort to provide a glossary for novice submissives of words commonly seen on this site and in the BDSM community. Mr. Samsonite. Every group has one; you know, the guy who can’t show up to the play party without enough luggage to go on a two-week European tour? He
What is Primal Play? Read More »
This is kinda pithy, so please hang in there! In this series thus far, I’ve done my absolute best to keep it positive. Maybe in some ways, I’ve managed to gloss over the ‘truth of singlehood’ of a slave, which in a way slightly misses the mark of my desire which is to help those
Single in the Scene Part V: The Truth about Singlehood Read More »
Financial Domination is an area of BDSM which often elicits strong opinions. With other BDSM activities such as spanking and bondage, at some point, after the Safe, Sane, and Consensual scene is over there is no damage done and things are typically physically back to the way they were. However, if a sub’s money is
Male submission – Financial Domination Read More »
To look at perhaps a more advanced topic that also does not get a lot of play when we are speaking about those of us in 24/7 service arrangements with children present; this month we are going to talk about Homes with multiple s-types and D-types. By far and away not a common arrangement, there
Are you looking for kink friends and fun close to you? Have you heard about munches, but don’t know what they are, much less where to look? Are you traveling or relocating and not sure about the community at your destination? Or, are you already involved, and you want your local organization to grow? FindaMunch.com
Find a Munch at FindaMunch.com! Read More »
This is the first in an ongoing series where I will be writing about key factors it takes to have a successful relationship. This first article is about the importance that communication plays in our relationships. Awhile ago, I came across this article in the NY Times about how BDSM has become a bit more mainstream thanks
Keys to a Successful Relationship-It’s All About Communication Read More »
I listened to a podcast from Erotic Awakening the other day that talked about The Slave Journal. The idea for this document is not the same as having a journal or blog to document your life in and I thought it was an excellent idea and a useful tool for many relationships. Maybe even yours! So,
Using a Slave Journal – It’s Not What You Think! Read More »
After writing “ Rules for the Working Sub” my Dom suggested that I continue writing articles that focus on the long distance aspects of our relationship. At her encouragement, I’ve decided to try my hand at a series which I hope will be of help to anyone who is involved or is thinking of becoming involved,
Submitting in a Long Distance Relationship: Introduction Read More »
I was on Tumblr one morning and I came across a picture of Johnny Depp and something he had said. Now, I had seen this particular picture several times and thought nothing of it in the past, but this last time I stumbled across it, I got thinking. The more I thought about this quote,
Having Enough Love for More than Just One Partner Read More »
Although many submissive individuals would say that they were born submissive personalities, there are some who found themselves surprised by how much they enjoyed being the submissive partner in their relationships. By nature, I am not a submissive person. I was taught from a very early age to have my own opinions and to assert
Becoming Comfortable with My Submissive Role Read More »
