I’ve noticed a lot of questions in FetLife recently (and almost always) about how to maintain the mindset in a 24/7 relationship. I’ve not responded to these there because I’ve created this article as my reply. The advice that the people have received may or may not help them. My thoughts on the subject are […]
The Myth of the 24/7 Submissive Mindset (and Why So Many of Us Struggle) Read More »
This is a guest post by Shahjahani a personal friend and Hospice Nurse. “Grief is a journey, not something you get over” Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D. Grief can be experienced for many reasons, not just the loss of a loved one. Grief is not just related to the loss of a person’s physical presence. Grief
7 Myths of Grieving and Understanding Your Responses to Death Read More »
Pride, Merriam-Webster: Pride is a slippery emotion that I believe many a slave deal with, even if we don’t recognize it. I’m not talking about the feeling of elation and accomplishment after a job well done or when we’ve been recognized and given kudos. But, there is this thing; this lapse in judgment that many
Note To Self: Selfish Pride Comes Before A Fall Read More »
This is a guest post from Slave Dove. I am unsure where it originated, but am sharing it here from a now defunct website. These dinners are what many would view as a “scene” but they are not play parties. No one is available for physical “use” it is formal Old Guard Domination and submission at
Master’s Banquet – A formal D/s Feast Read More »
When I first discovered my submissive side, Sir gave me a BDSM checklist to fill out. It was a spreadsheet over six pages long with categories such as sex, bondage, S&M, role-playing, and toys. The columns include basic yes/no/maybe options, as well as soft/hard limit and “only with Sir.” The list was so comprehensive and
A Submissive’s New Year’s Resolutions: Reviewing and Updating your Checklist Read More »
This is a guest post by Erika McLean. My kids get up at just about 6 am like clockwork every day. They tend to wander out in the middle of the night into the living room because they’ve had a nightmare. Anyone who has kids is going to recognize this as how your own life works. Anyone who
When the Walls Have Ears – 5 Strategies for D/s and BDSM Play with Kids Around Read More »
This is a guest post by kaya of Underhishand.com. For Master. When I used to say “Oh I want someone who can push me… who doesn’t stop when I say stop… who does what they want and aren’t guided by MY reactions”, I can honestly say that I never believed such a person existed. I
Accepting Fear through Obedience Read More »
I often get the question about how I can be submissive all the time, that I must have other responsibilities that should take precedence on occasion and submission is often turned off. I can understand where these questions are coming from but for me, submission isn’t what I do, it’s who I am. It’s much
Everyone Needs a Break, Right – Do you Break from Submission? Read More »
Ever since the advent of the Internet, people have been hooking up via technology. A whole new world opened up for people who were shy, not a part of a smaller community or felt like they couldn’t find a date anywhere. For many people who date online, they will say that being anonymous and looking
Write an Online BDSM Dating Profile That Gets Results! Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Is your need to submit being met? If not, or if your situation changed, do you think that you could continue in your life and still be happy/content if you were never able to express your submission in the
30 Days of Submission: Day 30 – What Makes Submission Special? Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Is pain or humiliation (spankings for example) a part of your submission? What is your relationship to it? Do you embrace it as a part of your submission, tolerate it as necessary or have some other type of relationship
30 Days of Submission: Day 29 – BDSM in the Relationship Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Has your submission ever let you down? Have you ever been criticized for your submission? Have you ever regretted being or feeling submissive in a moment or in a relationship? Have you ever looked back and realized you made
30 Days of Submission: Day 28 – Negativity about Submission Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Do you have submissive desires or fantasies that you have yet to be able to explore? Do some of your desires confuse or frighten you? Do they excite you? I have sexual fantasies but I have to say that
30 Days of Submission: Day 27 – Fantasies Waiting Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! What are the qualities you seek in a dominant partner and why? Are some qualities deal-breakers as in “must” haves or “must not” have? When I was looking for a Dominant I wasn’t really sure what I was looking
30 Days of Submission: Day 26 – Qualities of My Ideal Dominant Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Are there items, objects or rituals that represent or help you express submission? If not, have you ever thought of adding or being gifted one? Is there a special significance to these objects or rituals? My relationship is full
30 Days of Submission: Day 25 – Rituals of Submission Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! What are the emotions that most directly let you access submission? What feelings do they inspire? I really had to think about this one for awhile because I feel my submission isn’t an emotion and doesn’t need to be
30 Days of Submission: Day 24 – Emotional Connection to Submission Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Is there anything about submission (yours or what you see in others) that you question, dislike or repels you? Was there a time you questioned or were resistant to your own submissive feelings? Wow. I spent a good long
30 Days of Submission: Day 23 – Questioning my Submission Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Can you feel submissive without a dominant partner? If so, how does your submission express itself? If not, how do you handle your submission or submissive feelings? I do believe that you can feel submissive without a Dominant but
30 Days of Submission: Day 22 – Submission without Domination, is it possible? Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Is there a physical position that makes you feel most submissive? As common as this sounds whenever I’m below his belt/waist height I feel more submissive to him. It could simply be because I have to look up to
30 Days of Submission: Day 21 – Positions of Submission Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Has your submission increased or decreased over time? Have you ever had to renegotiate your submission due to a change in your feelings or circumstance? Honestly, I can’t say if my submission has increased or decreased over time because
30 Days of Submission: Day 20 – Fluctuating Submission Read More »
