I went to a local kink event and as an icebreaker, the host asked everyone to say what kind of animal they relate to. When I said I relate to a lioness, I got a ton of strange looks. I suppose it makes sense. As a submissive, it might not seem like I’d relate to […]
I Am Submissive–Hear Me Roar! Read More »
You’re sitting at your computer (or tablet, or phone) right now and have wondered for some time about going to a BDSM munch or a party or convention but are afraid that you don’t fit into the image you have in your head of who really is into BDSM. You’ve seen the porn on Kink.com
You Don’t Have to Be a Porn Star or Fashion Model to Participate in BDSM Read More »
Recently I heard something in the midst of a talk about obedience that just made me stop and really think for a moment – and I mean deep thought too! Delayed obedience becomes immediate disobedience; partial obedience is complete disobedience. Yes, my mind had to reflect on the matter of obedience. Honestly, I can’t say
Obedience: A Slavey Meditation Read More »
Whenever I frequent online groups, a common theme in them is telling the person asking a question to not be a doormat. Rarely do we ever get a description of what a doormat submissive is or how to prevent becoming one (or even if the person is actually a doormat submissive). There are many misconceptions of what
8 Ways You Might Be a “Doormat” Submissive and How to Stop Read More »
I’ve been in relationships before. I know how they should work, or at least I think I do. Sometimes I wonder if everyone has forgotten how things are supposed to work just because they are in a D/s relationship instead of a vanilla one. Many of the questions on social networking for kinky people stems
4 Things You Should Not Put Up With Just Because They Are a Dominant Read More »
“She was afraid, however, that she hadn’t pleased him. She searched her mind for faults. She had obeyed all his commands, and he understood how difficult it was for her. He knew completely what it meant for her to be stripped naked and revealed to everyone, to be helpless and made public and that this
Am I Trying Hard Enough? Learning How to Make the Most of Your Inner Submissive Voice Read More »
If you ask any sadist what they enjoy out of pain play, it’s likely going to be watching the bottom respond to the pain. The more response, the higher the enjoyment for the top. Why is this important? Well, if the method of pain management doesn’t allow you to respond well to the pain, then
Learning About Negative Pain Processing Methods Read More »
“I want my Dominant to spank me more.” “How can I tell him I need more praise and approval without topping from the bottom?” “I need more attention, how can I tell him without being pushy?” “Can I tell him I love him and still be submissive? “How do I tell him that my needs
How To Ask for More Without Being a Pushy Submissive Read More »
Given that it’s February and the world around us has been saturated with heart-shaped balloons, greeting cards, and overly expensive roses, I thought it might be a good time to discuss one way of seeing a D/s relationship. Does this apply to every D/s relationship? Certainly not. D/s relationships are like zebras; no two look the
Domifriends: The Best of Both Worlds Read More »
KnyghtMare and I get lost in romance sometimes. The love we have for each other manifests in affection, mushy moments where we can only say how much we love each other and that overwhelming sense of joy that comes from a strong romance. For us romance is a part of our M/s relationship. Without knowing
What a Romantic Dominant/submissive Relationship Looks Like Read More »
Everyone you meet has different methods for how they handle pain. Think about the last time your stubbed your toe. How did you respond to the pain? Did you jump up and down? Curse? Cry? Hold your breath? Walk it off? How you handle pain is a result of nature and nurture. Perhaps as you
Understanding Natural Pain Processing Techniques for Better BDSM Play Read More »
As a novice looking for a relationship it is a good thing to know if discipline and punishment are something you are looking for. The punishment I’m talking about today is the correction for infractions, or getting into trouble. It’s not about the playtime activities which can be called punishment also. So, thinking about your
Why A Punishment Dynamic May be Just What You Need Read More »
Originally published April 9, 2011 on Fearless Press when I was a guest author there. From an early age, I would look into the mirror and see only the things I wish I could change; from the dimple in my chin, my growing belly and fat arms to my round face, huge jiggly ass. Then I didn’t
Seeing a Desirable Me: Learning Body Confidence through the Fingers of a Lover Read More »
“To err is human. To forgive is divine.” The start of a new year is a very popular time for resolutions and goals, but it’s also a great time for letting go of the past and letting bygones be bygones. In theory, it’s a great idea. Who doesn’t want a fresh start to the New
A Submissive’s New Year’s Resolutions: Letting Go and Offering Forgiveness Read More »
You are in trouble and waiting for corporal punishment. You are anxious, sad, depressed, frustrated about the whole thing but you know that you did something wrong and need to atone for it to get on the right path again. No one likes getting punished (at least you shouldn’t), so what happens if, as the
What to Do When Punishment Starts to Feel Good Read More »
People often misunderstand how relationship communication works because they may have had such poor examples or think that coercing or manipulating someone is par for the course. You don’t want to tease someone, push them to get angry or jealous with you in hopes that the ensuing fight ends with hot and steamy makeup sex
Five Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Manipulate Your Vanilla Man into Being a Dominant Read More »
Most adults over the age of 21 already know that a trip to Las Vegas can yield any number of experiences, mostly depending on what you’re looking for. Las Vegas is one of the few places in the world where you can literally say “anything is possible.” It’s a fun place for singles, couples, and
Road Trip: Taking your D/s Relationship to Fantastic Las Vegas! Read More »
This is a guest post by moonlight. Many of us love our kinky toys and the collection just keeps growing the longer you are in the community. Floggers, canes, crops, clothespins, candles, you name it. If you look around my house, those aren’t the toys you will see – it looks more like an explosion
These Aren’t Your Toys! Child-Proofing For Your BDSM Toys Read More »
Today’s newsletter is going to be a light and fun one, I hope. I’ve done some work to find jokes and funny stories with a BDSM or sexual slant to them. Not everything we do in BDSM is serious. Here’s a story, told by my Master KnyghtMare. It’s a true story. The AC Was Broken…
Humor in BDSM – Jokes, Funny Tales, and When the AC Was Broken Read More »
Every December as the holidays wane, we start thinking about New Year’s resolutions and ways to make our lives better. The New Year is a fresh start and optimism is contagious. For submissives, though, resolutions mean so much more. Frankly, I’ve decided that the world would be a better place if everyone had a Dom/me
A Submissive’s New Year’s Resolutions: Goal Setting in a D/s or M/s Dynamic Read More »
