Your scene has just ended and you both feel spent, exhausted and buzzing with good feelings. And then you look around the room, move your aching limbs and start to come out of your or play-induced fog.
The room is a mess, there are toys everywhere. Both of you need aftercare. Who does what? How do you prioritize everything?
Submissive Guide has a lot of resources on clean up, aftercare and check-ins that get lost in the archives. I’ve pulled together what I have here, as well as all over the web to make this a comprehensive post for all things “after the scene”. Bookmark it, share it, use it.
Aftercare
What is Aftercare? – The BDSM Glossary post on the topic with links to articles and external resources.
– This post answers the questions of what is aftercare, how do you know you need it, what sorts of things happen in aftercare and whether the Top needs aftercare. A great basic stop.
Caring for Yourself After a Scene – Self-Aftercare
– Some aftercare happens hours or days after the scene. How do you take care of yourself when you may be feeling your worst? Visit this post to learn some tips and tricks to get you back on your feet like making an Aftercare Kit.
How to Help Your Dominant Recover from Play
– You aren’t the only one who experienced intense sensation and emotions during play. Your Dominant needs aftercare too!
Clean-up
First Aid for Bruises, Abrasions, and other Post Play Marks – General first aid for the common ailments after a scene, from bruise care, cuts, scrapes, and burns.
Going to the Doctor with Kink-Related Marks or Bruises
– If you have to go to the Doctor, it’s a good idea to know what to expect and how to describe your marks so that you can reduce or avoid the questions about abuse and domestic violence when you know it was consensual kink.
BDSM and Sex Toy Cleaning and Care
– A document I produced for the local BDSM munch group on how to clean and care for toys.
BDSM Toys and the Risk of Infectious Disease – A good article about how STI’s can be passed from our toys.
Check-ins
Using Playtime Check-Ins Wisely
Share your tips and thoughts on aftercare, clean up and check-ins in the comments! What do you recommend for each category?