As a submissive, it can be easy to get into the habit of trudging along in a daily routine. You know what you should be doing: for some, the routine is detailed out hour to hour or even more so. You get comfortable and secure in the routine because you are confident that you are doing what you have been told to do. So then why does this feel like it’s not enough? Because it isn’t.
Dominants in most cases don’t want drones, robots, doormats, mannequins.. need I go on? No? Okay good, you get the picture. Admittedly there are those that do. Sorry, but those I don’t understand but to each their own kink. Those that I have come to get to know do not, so if you are only following instructions to the minimal amount of your ability you can expect a minimal amount, if any, of feedback or recognition. Would that make you happy? You should be shaking your head no here.
So, what is the Spirit of the Rule? It is the underlying foundation of the rule. The reason the rule exists. So why are rules given to us by our Dominants? Do you think that they are just there to appease the Dominant? If you are thinking that way then maybe you should take a moment to re-evaluate your relationship with your Dominant.
Now, don’t get me wrong, there are those rules which are specifically for pleasing your Dominant, but in general, rules are set in order to guide you towards your goal of behaving in a manner that is pleasing to both your Dominant and yourself. You should want to embrace the rules with your mind, body, and soul. Don’t just look at them like you do your daily chores.
Here are some examples of violating the spirit of the rule in order to help you to recognize some things that perhaps you do, but don’t realize it, or if you realize it, I can guarantee your Dominant will pick it up too. When you are told to not interrupt your Dominant, but instead of looking Him/Her in the eyes, you are looking around, appearing bored, twiddling your thumbs, fidgeting, or otherwise. Another example is that you were told to be back by say 12:30, and you wait until 12:29 to check in, even though you were finished with your task at 12:00. That is not only violating the spirit of the rule, but it’s also lying. Often these things are overlooked. This could be easily misconstrued as you, the submissive, not wanting to be in service to your Dominant, when that may be the furthest from the truth.
So in closing, take a moment and really think about the rules that are in place in your D/s relationship. Why are they there? If you do not know, then ask your Dominant, as it would be better to understand the spirit of the rule then to assume such yourself and be wrong. Not only that, but if you take a moment to go over your rules, perhaps you will find a piece of yourself that has been missing from your submission. In finding such, you will also serve your Dominant in a more complete manner.
Happy Submitting