KnyghtMare enjoys a foot massage on what used to be a regular basis. Every Sunday night I would fill the plastic tub with hot water and salts to soak his feet before his massage. After they had soaked I would towel them off and then with massage oil or lotion would lovingly massage his feet. It was a time of connection for me and service for him.
Why don't I do it now? Carpal Tunnel. But there are moments where I still long to give those massages, that intimate moment where I feel complete submission and joy. I'm not a foot fetishist or even someone who likes feet. But knowing that he gets pleasure from my service to his feet I loved to give it to him. Every so often I will give him a shorter version of that massage. He's very aware that my wrists flare up easily with repetitive motions like I do to his feet. He protects me by not allowing me to get lost in the feeling and to pay attention when my wrists are beginning to weaken.
How can you make massage a part of a ritual for you?
It doesn't have to be a foot massage like it is with KnyghtMare and I. It can be a hand rub, a back rub or a full body massage. The ritual part is that it's done regularly and with reverence to the act. It becomes a special moment in time for you and your partner. You get to absorb yourself in your service and they get to receive a relaxing massage.
It's not as hard as you might think, especially since you don't have to be professionally trained to give a decent massage. I have a couple "Dummies Guides" for massage that have helped me learn specific motions and tricks that KnyghtMare really likes. It's a joy to continue to learn more about what I can do for him so it's great worth for me to have those books. Start with motions that you know you'd like to feel. Listen to what they prefer, their breathing and overall manner to your massage.
Connecting to your spirit while you massage takes practice. I've learned to reach mine through mediation. In the quiet of your mind, you can find the perfect joy of submission that you know is there but typically gets caught up in the real world gets in the way. It's your ideal and in a ritual, you can reach that place.
- Quiet your breathing. Take slow measured breaths, perhaps in time with the rubbing motion.
- Close your eyes if you can. If you can't, shift your eyes out of focus so you aren't staring at any one thing in particular (like when you are spacing off).
- Stop thinking or internal monolog. You need silence. If something pops into your head just push it back again.
- Feel the submissive joy come to the surface. Let it bloom.
I'm not a hippie. I don't mediate all the time. But I have learned when it works for me to help me keep a submissive mindset that is pleasing for Master. Give it a try the next time you want to employ a new ritual. It may add that bit of reverence you desire and your time will be special and remembered for that.
Massage, even self-massage is a way to relax. So is meditation. I find the best rituals work when both parties are relaxed in their role or within themselves. Even sexual rituals work this way.
Manual and Oral Sex as a Massage Ritual
You may already know and understand that giving manual or oral sex feels good, it relaxes both parties and it connects the partners in an intimate act. To make sex a ritual you have to apply some of the tactics above. Don't focus on the end result - enjoy the journey. Feel and savor every part of your partner's genitals. Explore, gently massage and caress them. Heighten the senses by learning new techniques. Many of the massage tips you learn for the entire body can be used here in gentler strokes.
The importance of using manual and oral sex as a ritual is the process and the contentedness you feel. It should make you feel at peace, happy, blissful and full of submissive joy.
Thoughts to Ponder
- What rituals do you have in your relationship?
- How do you make the service you perform special?
- Do you practice some sort of massage for worship or ritual?