The Basics of Negotiating a BDSM Scene

Negotiating play is vital for new players or for those who have never played together. Once you get to know someone it is likely that unless you have something you'd really like to experience you can forego some negotiation for spontaneity.

The Truth About Orgasm Control and Denial

The idea of orgasm control or denial strikes fears in novice submissives. "What do you mean give over my ability to orgasm whenever I want?" Sure you could think of it that way, but in terms of your submission it could mean so much more.

Honest Communication or Bust

"Full transparency" isn't just something we bat around on BDSM forums. And it's not necessarily something exclusive to the master/slave or owner/property dynamics. It's actually sort of important in any relationship, regardless of dynamic, or lack thereof. It is the key to "making it work". And it's best to start in the beginning.

I didn't start until what was almost the end. I wasted the first six years of our relationship telling him what I thought he wanted to hear. I thought it was my duty. My responsibility as property.

Psychological Aspects of Consensual Rape in BDSM Scenarios

"Consensual rape." Quite an oxymoron, I suppose. Rape, by definition, is sexual intercourse in which one party is unwilling and unwanting of the attention and act. A consensual act is something quite contrary to that initial concept of rape. A consensual act is one in which all parties are in agreement as to the parameters, activities, and boundaries of said act. How then, does the term "consensual rape" have any validity at all?

Handling Absence in a Long Distance Relationship

The reality of long-distance relationships, or any non-live-in relationship, is that you will have to handle periods of absence. It's a painful and bitter reminder that you are not together and that your desires for each other have to go unquenched. But that doesn't mean you can't get through them with a few coping techniques.

Rule #1 - Don't Touch Anything Without Permission

You'll meet white collar, blue collar and poverty stricken people in the same room enjoying conversation with each other. But a select few people haven't learned about spatial boundaries or that the number one rule in groups across the country and perhaps the world is that you don't touch anyone or anything without permission.

Thoughts on Isolation and Feeling Alone

The more isolated I am, the more isolated I want to be. The more I rely on Master to satisfy any needs I have, the less I want anyone or anything to interfere with that.

How To Get Over Being Angry When Punished

Having a hard time getting past being angry with your Dominant when you've been punished? Mrs. Darling provides some great advice on processing your emotions surrounding corporal punishment.

When Journaling Gets Hard - How Depression Affected Our D/s Dynamic and How My Journal Helped Bring Us Back Together

This is a personal account of what can happen when journalling goes wrong. In Elle's case, it was when she became depressed. It's about how to recognize that there is a problem, and what you and your dominant might do to overcome it.