One of the hardest things we do as submissives is asking for play. For many of us, coming out and saying we want play feels like we are topping from the bottom, stepping out of our submissive boundaries and doing something that isn't in our character. But I'm here to tell you that it isn't.
Our Dominants train us to obey their orders, to change bad behavior to positive habits and to have open and honest communication with them at all times. It's that last one that we'll focus on. Do you disagree that it is our responsibility as submissives to tell our Dominants when we have the itch to play? It also pertains to sex, if that wasn't clear. Why do we feel that it isn't our place to suggest play? It's some suggestion that asking for something puts us in a place of control. But asking has never put anyone in control, it puts someone in supplication to someone else. By asking to play or have sex you are supplicating to your Dominant. It's powerful.
They want to hear when you are itching to play, they want to know that you are randy for them. It's sexy. It's hot. And it gives them so much power and control. Why? Because they get to decide what to do with that information. Do they want to keep you aching and on edge? Or do they want to play hard and fast, leaving you sweating and panting afterward?
So how do you ask for play? How do you get over the frog in your throat and speak your lusty, slutty mind? Well, he's one way that might help you.
1. Get yourself in a submissive headspace. If this means kneeling, meditation, mantras, whatever then do it. Let that desire to play drive your desires. Stroke them into a burning ember.
2. Present yourself to your Dominant in a manner that is appealing to them. Do they like you wearing anything specific? Maybe just a sultry smile and a twinkle in your eye? Dress up, look hot and smolder as you approach them.
3. Lean in for the reveal. Whisper in their ear that you are hot for them, that you want them. Tell them dirty secrets if you can. Anything to get them focused on you and your power to exude a sexy sweet submissive in front of them.
4. Ask. Take all the guts you have and ask them for what you want. Do you want a spanking? A scene? Sex? Lay it out before them. Always make it a question, a question that's hard to refuse.
5. Wait for them to decide what to do. Now, just because you presented to them in a hard to deny manner, they are still the Dominant. It's their decision as to when or if to fulfill your request. Hopefully, you've earned a randy Dominant in the process.
Will it work? Who knows, but you've learned a sultry way to ask and I'm certain you can imagine many ways that will work for your personal situation.