Full Question: How do I talk to my Dom that I want more pain, especially in spankings? He is worried about hurting me and nervous, but I am okay with it, so how do I show him how and support him in this? Answer: Your desire for more pain is making you ignore something very […]
How do I talk to my Dom that I want more pain, especially in spankings? Read More »
Full Question: How do I ask my Dominant for what I want without sounding demanding? Answer: First, communication is the only way your Dominant will know anything about what you want and need, so talking about those things is important to the health of your relationship and your submissive journey. Healthy communication styles require practice
How do I ask my Dominant for what I want without sounding demanding? Read More »
Full Question: How can I explain to my wife that while I enjoy being spanked and flogged, it doesn’t mean pain play is my only source of pleasure or intimacy? Answer: Your communication with your wife should be open and honest, even about things in the bedroom. It can be difficult for people to talk
Full Question: I am a submissive sissy with a Dom Daddy that likes to give me oral pleasure but I don’t like it. When he does it reminds me of my male side and turns me off! How can I explain to him how I wish he wouldn’t do that? Answer: It can be hard
How Can I Ask Him To Stop Doing Something That Turns Me Off? Read More »
I think about that word all the time. Need. “I need this, too,” Jack told me. And everything changed. By taking care of me, he was taking care of himself. I don’t think I’d ever tried to envision the situation from a Dom’s point of view before. I was so fucking grateful whenever I found
Talking to Your Dominant: When A Desire Becomes a Need Read More »
Communicate. Communicate. Communicate. People in the D/s and BDSM lifestyles love to say this word. We emphasize that it’s the cornerstone of the relationship, that it is the key to a successful relationship and that negotiation, a form of communication, needs to be done on a regular basis depending on the situation and relationship type.
What Do You Mean When You Say Communicate? I am Communicating! Read More »
Being submissive doesn’t mean giving up your needs. This article explores how to identify, communicate, and prioritize your personal needs in a D/s relationship. From emotional safety to structure and love, you’ll learn why honoring your needs is essential for thriving in submission—and why settling for less isn’t an option.
You’re Allowed to Have Needs—Even in Submission Read More »
Weeding through the number of messages in your inbox asking to get to know you better is a daunting task to most single people, and being submissive looking for a Dominant is no different. Well, perhaps it’s a little different. The compatibility that you are looking for as a submissive is more specific and challenging.
Are There Basic Expectations in a Dominant That I Should Look For? Read More »
Read the entire series – go back to the Introduction of the 30 Days of Submission! Very often the stereotype of submission is that the submissive person loses the ability to have an opinion. While that clearly isn’t true except in the absolute rarest of occasions, how does communication factor into your submission and how
30 Days of Submission: Day 18 – Communicating Needs and Wants Read More »
The excitement of a new D/s relationship is often the first thing that a novice submissive seeks. How else are they going to learn about play, and submission than in a relationship, they might reason. There is a better, more prepared way than jumping into a relationship with someone before you are ready. Taking the
Know Thyself, Don’t Rush Into a Relationship Until You Know These Six Things Read More »
To conclude this series on wants and needs I’d like to talk about what to do when you needs and wants are not being met. We’ve already discussed how important the fulfillment of needs are to your relationship and also what your desires are. You can also review how to express your wants and needs to your partner so
What Should You Do When Your Wants or Needs Aren’t Met? Read More »
In the previous post about Wants and Needs we began to understand the importance of Needs for ourselves and our relationship. If you would like to go back and read The Importance of Needs to review, please do so. In this post, I’d like to talk about how to express your wants and needs with yourself and
How To Talk About Your Wants and Needs With Your Dominant Read More »
In the previous post about wants and needs you made a list of your wants and a list of your needs so that you had them defined for your training resume. In this essay, I will share why needs are so important to your overall health and happiness in a relationship and why settling for less than
What Everybody Ought To Know About Basic Needs and Need Deficits Read More »
