While many of us will feel guilty when we need time away from our dominants, there is no question that it is productive and therapeutic. Spending time exclusively with your partner and not getting any personal time alone, especially introverts can be somewhat of a challenge. If you’re stuck in self-isolation, having coping mechanisms to […]
10 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Dynamic in Isolation with Your Dominant Read More »
The other day in a submissive’s group I’m in on Facebook, a member made a post about something her dominant wanted her to do, yet she was absolutely 100% against doing and was looking for help on how to get past her unwillingness. There were several comments and there was one in particular that caught
Submission Isn’t Easy-Nor for Your Convenience Read More »
Accepting criticism is never an easy thing to do. It’s extremely hard to accept it from people we know, but in my opinion, it’s even harder to accept criticism or negative comments from random Internet people. Why you ask? Because these people who you don’t know and don’t know you, or maybe only sort of
31 Days of Submissive Journaling: Day 22 – How to Manage Negative Comments Without Rage Read More »
Hello, I have a question. I’m having a hard time getting past just being angry when my Dom punishes me. Specifically corporal punishment. I understand what I do wrong but it is so hard to just lay there and take it as they say. I don’t want to start a conflict with Sir, I just
How To Get Over Being Angry When Punished Read More »
Once you know that you owe someone an apology, you’ve got to know how to apologize. Nothing is worse than being on the receiving end of an apology that sounds more like it’s a backhanded wave of secondary attacks, and the last thing that you want to do is turn your apologetic conversation into a
The Art of Apology: How to Apologize Read More »
We all know that communicating well with our partners is one of the most important (and often hardest) aspects of keeping a relationship healthy. It’s something that’s talked about a lot in the BDSM community when we talk about meeting our wants and needs, as well as in the vanilla community where we address building
The Art of Apology: The Importance of Apologizing Read More »
In every single article I write, I stress the importance of communication, so you would think that I practice as I preach and work really hard to include communication in my relationship. And truth is, I do try, but I have realized that open and honest communication with a partner can only happen when I
Opening Communication with Myself Read More »
Do you have any advice for someone in a triad that is constantly feeling like a third wheel because the other female sub puts a constant emphasis on being “wife” and legally married to the male dominant of the relationship? Saying we are equal to him, but her actions and words don’t back it up
Poly Conflict: Feeling Like a Third Wheel in a Triad Read More »
Communication is key – I say it in every article, but it becomes no less true. Communication is imperative to any relationship, especially one in which your physical and mental health are at risk. This week I have had trouble. Master is very interested in entering into a poly-dynamic. While this initially sounded very attractive
Talking Even When Words Are Hard: Opening the Lines of Communication With Your Dominant Read More »
I know what you are thinking when reading the title. How can a submissive get mad at their Dominant? Isn’t a relationship built on trust and communication going to run smoother than one that isn’t? That’s not a very good submissive behavior! No, probably not, but it is a human one and we are humans
How to Keep a Cool Head When You Get Angry With Your Dominant Read More »
“ If you’re angry, take deep breaths. If you’re really angry, swear.” – Mark Twain My friend says on her blog, “Anger and I are old friends.” This is why I like her blog so much because she is very realistic. You’ll probably see a lot of submissives say that they never get angry at their
Dealing With Anger As a Submissive Read More »
Not too long ago, my pup and I were faced with something that rears its ugly head to everyone-lifestyle or not. The dreaded “outside force.” What is this intruder you may ask? Well, it is anything outside of the relationship that causes undue tension within a pairing; it is never welcome and always has to be handled
How To Overcome The Outside Forces That Stress Us Read More »
Frustration is a normal human response. It can get out of hand and escalate to anger if not handled well. As submissives, we seem to deal with frustration more openly than others in the lifestyle. Let’s start with a definition from Wikipedia about frustration. In psychology, frustration is a common emotional response to opposition. Related to
Overcoming Frustration and Anger as a Submissive Read More »
In a previous article, I discussed conflict resolution in a D/s relationship. This post will continue the discussion on returning to your submissive role after the argument. So, you’ve taken my advice from the previous article and stepped outside your roles to resolve a conflict with your partner. Perhaps you had an all-out fight. Relationships
3 Ways to Recover From a Fight and Return to Submission Post-Argument Read More »
Last month I had a question show up in my inbox that actually had me puzzled for a bit. Not that the question was difficult at all, but that I honestly didn’t think about how I handle it in our relationship, so I got up and asked KM. He assured me that my thought process
5 Ways to Resolve Conflict in a D/s Relationship Read More »
