Full Question: How do I become more confident with dirty talk?
Answer:
Taking the first steps toward talking dirty isn’t an easy process. You have to deal with embarrassment, discomfort, and the fear that your partner will just laugh at you.
It takes practice and repetition to learn to talk dirty when you aren’t confident with it. First, identify what makes you uncomfortable. Understanding why dirty talk is hard for you will make your practice more focused on confidence in those areas.
If word choice makes you uncomfortable:
Write out phrases. Take some time and write out phrases you’ve thought about, heard, or read elsewhere. Read them aloud before bed. Have these phrases on the tip of your tongue to vocalize them when the time comes.
Learn the slang. There are so many ways to say what you are doing that you are more comfortable with. The Dirty Slang Dictionary is a good place to start. If you need even more, try DirtySlang.com or buy the book, Sex Talk: Uncensored Exercises for Exploring What Really Turns You on.
If vocalizing your desires to someone else makes you uncomfortable:
Practice during masturbation. Start with whispers. Just get comfortable hearing your voice while you pleasure yourself. After a while, start using one-word phrases, “yes,” “god,” “fuck,” “oh,” and your partner’s name. Then some of the phrases you learned above. As before, whisper them first and then get a little bolder; before long, you’ll be able to scream these words.
If the feeling you’ll say something silly makes you uncomfortable:
Break down your barriers. There is usually a mental barrier to your discomfort in verbalizing during sex. Identifying that block will help you free yourself from the feeling of taboos and open your mind sexually to the pleasures that talking dirty can bring into the bedroom. Expressing desire is natural and healthy. You are normal and deserving of the pleasure you seek.
Start by describing what you are feeling. “Oh that feels good!” “I’m all tingly inside!” “I’m so wet/hard!” “That tickles!”
Then say what your partner is doing to you. “Yes, kiss me!” “Lick my pussy” “Suck my dick” “Fuck me hard!”
You can move to begging and asking for what you want from sex after that. The sky is the limit; you can get into your mind and draw out that dirty slang you learned.
Even the shyest person can use these steps to ROCK at talking dirty! I hope that these few tips will begin to open your mind and eventually your mouth to some of the hottest sex you can have when you just verbalize.