Many of the BDSM activities we may engage in are inherently sexual in nature, even if no sex actually occurs. Being aware and using safe sex barriers when necessary is your protection from disease and infection. I’m amazed by casual play partners that don’t employ these simple techniques to protect themselves and future partners. But even monogamous relationships might use safe sex barriers to prevent pregnancy and for ease of clean up.
If you are going to engage in sexual activities of any sort the only protection you have from infections and disease is the use of barriers. Latex condoms, dams and gloves are your best friends (latex-free if you have an allergy). Use them correctly and consistently for all and any vaginal, anal and/or oral sex, with any or all of your partners.
If you didn’t start your sexual life being proactive with safer sex barriers it’s never too late to start. How much risk you and yours are willing to take at any time, and how much you want to do to reduce those risks is your choice to make. I just want to arm you with the tools and know how to make it easy to add them into your already exciting kinky lives.
Your Basic Safer Sex Kit for Cheap
For around $30-40 you can put together a well-supplied safe sex kit to have on hand for all of your sexual encounters. Store it near your bedside or with your kinky supplies (or both!) for ready access and less fumbling in the moment. All of these supplies can be found in drugstores, grocery stores, clinics, online, and sex shops.
One box of latex condoms
, preferably without spermicide. Get a few flavored ones too for those hot oral sex moments. Trustex makes some good flavors. If either of you has a latex allergy then polyurethane works just as well. Do not use animal-based condoms as they do not block microorganisms. There are also female condoms, they are pricier, but it’s nice to have them on hand as well.
Average Cost: $10
One bottle of latex-safe water based lubricant
. You can even get single use tubes of it so you can try flavored lubes. My personal preference is System Jo H2O.
Average Cost: $12
One box of latex gloves
, or non-latex if you prefer it. Any drug store sells these in one size or a specific size. Get the non-powered if you can ( check out how to make a dental dam with one of these!).
Average Cost: $5
Dental Dams
, or if you can’t find them, plain-old plastic wrap for cunnilingus. Or you can use this way simple how-to to make a dental dam out of a latex(non-latex) glove! I recommend LIXX Dams.
Average Cost of 5 Dental Dams: $7 Average Cost of 1 Box of Plastic Wrap: $2
A Little Tube of Aloe Vera Gel
Say What? Yeah, that’s what I thought, but after doing some reading this little warrior can help soothe skin that may have reacted badly to some lubricants or condoms. A little aloe will soothe your skin and stop swelling and allergic reactions that can make the transmission of disease more likely. Apply, let it sit a bit and then wipe clean. You’re good as new.
Average Cost: $3
Total Cost: $34
How to Turn a Latex Glove into a Safe Sex Barrier for Cunnilingus
You might be amazed at the ingenuity or you will just shrug and say, “Yeah I knew that.” I was amazed when I read how to do this and it’s so darned easy! ( from about.com)
1. Cut 4 fingers off a glove, leaving the thumb in place. 2. Slit up the side opposite the thumb. 3. Rinse talcum off a glove. 4. Put some water-based lubricant on the side with the thumb protruding. 5. Place the lubricated side on your partner’s vulva. 6. Hold the glove in place with both hands, or have your partner hold it covering her labia. 7. Use your tongue to stimulate your partner. Insert your tongue into the thumb for extra fun. 8. After sex, be sure to dispose of glove safely. Turn it inside out and wash your hands. Only use each glove once.
When to use Safe Sex Barriers
Please remember your safe sex kit every time there will be contact with genitals. Even if it’s just manual stimulation, put on a glove. If you use toys, cover them. Never share rope that has been used on genitals. Other single user toys are gags, blindfolds, strap-ons, and all insertables.
Keep yourself safe and you’ll be playing disease and infection free for years to come.