Full Question: How common, realistic or successful is it to be seeking a Dominant with specific physical, emotional, and social traits? Is it rude to blatantly list specific physical and personality characteristics? (eg. ABC sub seeking Dom/Master with XYZ)
Answer:
It’s extremely common to have preferences for partners. When you’re dating and looking for a partner, knowing some qualities that you’re looking for is a good thing. After all, this person is likely going to be with you for a long time and you want to make sure you are compatible and happy together.
In fact, knowing what kind of person you’re looking for is an important first step before you create that dating profile or chat with potential Dominants. It’s crucial that you know who you want to date. By this I mean your views on morality, ethics, spirituality, politics, race, child-rearing, your taste in music, shows, food, theater, and especially your sense of humor. This list of qualities in a partner can include physical characteristics. If you prefer blondes with facial hair, or a certain height and body type, you aren’t likely to date someone who doesn’t fit those preferences, are you?
There is such a thing as being too picky, but for the sake of this question, I’m assuming you have standards you’re trying to meet and honestly want to know if it’s okay to have those standards. You should never settle for someone you don’t like just because they identify as Dominant. And don’t focus solely on the BDSM or D/s aspects of a person when looking for a Dominant unless you only intend to engage in those activities with them.
Be careful with the concessions you make because your preferences are there for a reason, but you should feel comfortable with a little give and take. Don’t change who you are no matter how perfect someone seems, but don’t give up or settle for something that is less than what you are looking for. Hold out for someone who embodies your dreams. They are out there somewhere.