There is an art to maintaining any relationship but a long distance one requires a bit more work because you rarely, if ever, see each other in the flesh. LDRs, as they are often called, can drain the parties involved and cause much stress to see flourish. They aren’t impossible to have, but quite difficult to maintain for long periods of time.
This isn’t a negative reflection for I too was an LDR submissive before my Dominant crossed the ocean for me. In that moment I knew my long distance days were over. But I did pick up some very important tips that I hope will help you if you happen to be in an LDR like I was.
1. Communicate Effectively
The most important glue to a relationship of this sort is being able to communicate effectively. This means being able to not only express your desires but also your emotions, feelings, thoughts and daily routine. What you may think as unnecessary to share this other person will probably miss. After all, they do not get to see you and interact with you on the same level your best friend does.
Not long ago writing letters used to be the only way people could connect in a more thorough manner. Now that art is dying but it has left an imprint behind for people living in a long distance relationship.
Writing may not be the only way we are able to communicate these days. Use text messaging, email and webcams to carry your words and emotions to your partner. Make use of all of the technology so that the connection you two carry will continue.
2. Don’t Waste Time Waiting
I don’t know how many hours I spent online waiting for my Dominant to make an appearance even though we had set a meeting time. I wasted hours chatting for no reason. Set a reasonable time to wait for your partner if they happen to be late. Leave a message for them to find when they return and go about your business.
3. Keep a Log
In those moments of loneliness and desperate need when your partner isn’t there to talk to a log of what they have said in the past is quite comforting. Save chat logs, text messages, and emails so that you can go back and read them again. It’s also a nice way to see how your relationship is developing and where issues might come up.
4. Find Common Interests Other than D/s
When talking with your partner, take the time to find common interests outside of the D/s. A solid relationship is built on many things and hobbies and entertainment away from D/s is a nice chunk of it. It will also give you more to talk about and bind you even further together. It can make the pain of distance less bitter when you know that they enjoy the same things you do and can think of them while you participate where you are.
5. Carry On With Life
Don’t put your life on hold for your partner. That’s what schedules and dates are for. When not communicating with them remember that you still have a life to lead. Go to work, buy groceries and hang out with friends. Keep yourself busy so that you aren’t constantly reminded that your partner is away from you.
6. Make Time for Yourself
Take care of yourself. I’ve seen too many LDRs where one or the other basically forgets time for themselves to do things that they want. Go see a movie, color your hair, take a long luscious bath. Not only would you be doing yourself good, but it will keep your emotions in check and the stress you feel from the long distance will release for a time.
7. Set Up a Plan to Meet
Even if it’s very unlikely you will ever meet, talk about what would happen if you did. Discuss travel and living arrangements. Talk about what you might do or where you might go. The hope and dream of seeing each other can light a flame under your desires and connect you even closer. And, if the fates are good, you just may fulfill that plan.