Full Question:
I met someone online, and he opened up to me about BDSM and him being a Dom.
I had never even heard of the term before. Almost a year later, I still have a lot of questions unanswered. He wants us to meet, and so do I, but I’m scared. He says that he wants to be in a D/s relationship. I don’t always know how to read him because I don’t know what is BDSM related and what isn’t. He’s very dominant, and so are his answers.
Should I keep confronting him with questions, or should I slow down?
Answer:
It can feel like an exciting time when you begin exploring BDSM, and you’ve found someone to explore it with. But, I would advocate getting to know what you’re getting into since you were introduced to BDSM by this person. From your message, you sound like you have many questions and aren’t sure what to expect. This alone makes me hesitant to give you the go-ahead to meet your partner.
While it can be an enjoyable experience to learn BDSM with a partner, I’m sensing from your message that you are having difficulty understanding and interacting with him. After a year, I hope you’d have a clearer understanding of what this person wants in a relationship and a partner and whether you feel you can provide that or want to explore BDSM.
I recommend slowing down. Questions will always need answers, but since you are still very new to BDSM in general, I advise you to learn as much as possible before entering a relationship. Browse a few websites about BDSM, type in your questions in Google search, and learn about the things you need answers for. Then, take some time to think about yourself.
At the very least, you will want to know if you are submissive, what sort of kinky things you might enjoy and what you want and need from a relationship and a partner.
Head over to Submissive Guide and explore the series made for novice submissives like yourself: https://bit.ly/New-Subs-Start-Here
If you’d like to ask questions, our Discord server is a safe, supportive place to get them answered: https://subgui.de/chat