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Are Relationships Not Worth Working On? How a Recent Challenge Brought Out The Disposable Relationship Mentality

I’ve been witness to a shocking new trend in relationships lately. Perhaps I’m old school or old-fashioned but what I’m seeing in today’s society, and not just the BDSM culture, is the lack of effort in relationships. As I was raised I was taught that something worthwhile wasn’t always easy to achieve and you may

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How to Revive Your Service When Protocol Becomes Boring

This entry is part 12 of 35 in the series Rituals, Rules and Protocol

Protocol. It can be a scary word if you are new to submission. In a relationship, it is likely that you will have some protocol established to control your behavior. So, what is protocol? Simply defined, a protocol is the set of special rules that you follow for defined situations that remind you of your

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Is It Submission If You Like What You’re Doing?

This entry is part 16 of 30 in the series Novice Submissives Start Here

I love surfing the submissive blogs to see what other people are talking about. Many times it gives me something to talk about here on this site. This post is one such example. Over on Underhishand.com, kaya asked about submission and what qualifies it as submission. She asked, “if you are not expected to do

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Should There Be Clear Definitions to Label Yourself In This Lifestyle?

So, you’ve met submissives and slaves online, their Dominant and Master counterparts but as you get to know them and how they interact you start to see the things they do blurring the lines of what you had believed a submissive was, or that a slave wasn’t supposed to act this way, etc. It brings

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The Challenges of Being Kajira in Today’s Society

Today’s guest post is by dina from Kajiradreams. You can also read her post on what it’s like to be an owned kajira and a kajira’s strengths and misconceptions. There is so many stereotypes, misconceptions of what a kajira is; what gor is; what the Gorean lifestyle is; what a BDSM lifestyler looks like; what that sort of relationship

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Don’t Assume Submissive Means Sister: Calling Me Your Sub Sister May Be a Bit Much

You know you’ve entered online submissive ground when everyone you don’t know starts to refer to you as a sister. It’s been years since I’ve ‘lived’ online but this is something that has always irked me. Recently on FetLife, I saw a question that had an interesting twist to the whole sister submissive thing that I’d like

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Add Convention, Class and Event Notes to your Submissive Training Resume

This entry is part 5 of 11 in the series The Submissive Resume

Your training resume should be growing in bulk and excellent information if you’ve been following along and developing your sections fully. We are now going to work on your community exposure section. What I mean by community exposure are all the classes, extended weekends, get aways and other events you’ve attended in your past that

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Another 7 Things You Can Do Today to Improve Your Submission

This entry is part 3 of 30 in the series Novice Submissives Start Here

A few months ago I started a list of things you can do to improve your submission immediately. If you want to see what’s on that list, you can find that post in the archives. I’d like to continue to add to that list because there are always things you can do but may not see

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Add Your Favorite BDSM Books Reading List to Your Submissive Training Resume

This entry is part 4 of 11 in the series The Submissive Resume

Since the beginning of Submissive Guide, I have been writing essays to help you build your service/submissive/slave resume. This is the living document of your experience and training on different tasks and a variety of relationships. If you are interested in reading the previous posts about the Training Resume I suggest you start at the topic

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