Submissive Frenzy is a state of mind that you may experience at any point in your submission. It is most commonly associated with new submissives, but it can also come about when more seasoned submissives end a relationship or even during a relationship. During submissive frenzy, you may feel a desperate need to have your desires fulfilled. Many of the activities in BDSM can be considered addictive and frenzy is much like a withdrawal stage.
I imagine that many of you during your younger years found a unspecific need or desire for something that you could not name. It possibly caused confusion and frustration and perhaps outbursts. You couldn’t name what you were needing, but there was a need. Then when you found out about submission and BDSM there was a moment where that need was named. In that moment it is likely that you began the initial stages of submissive frenzy.
You wanted it, you needed it, you had to have it and anything you could do to experience what you were longing for so long had to be met. Dangerously, this leads to lack of common sense and rational thought, desperation, and risky behavior. It is quite common that first experiences done in this frenzy can have a negative or damaging effect on the novice submissive. Your judgment is blurred and the Dominant you are in contact with could seem too wonderful, you ‘fall in love’ faster and will do anything to experience what they are offering.
During my initial sub frenzy, I met with a Dominant at their house, at night, for the first time. He was nice at first, but then things lead to play and it went too far. He harmed me in a no go zone. I accepted his apology but just 2 weeks later, he did the same thing again. This time landing me in the ER to have my tailbone area drained of fluid and bruising. This event straightened me up pretty fast and I become more cautious of who I saw and when. I would never wish this experience on anyone, however. Try not to feed the frenzy, no matter how desperate you may be.
As I noted earlier this state of frenzy can occur at any point in a submissive’s life and is not limited to the new submissive. In fact, it occurs sometimes even stronger in more seasoned submissives. They have a need that they recognize as perhaps to ‘have their edges taken off’, and they know exactly how that can be done through their own experience. The difference is that the older submissive can then ‘evaluate’ what part of their need is pressing upon them. Many then learn to go to a Dominant they are not bonded to and ask this person they trust (often as a good friend) to relieve their physical need (play). Many Dominant’s (experienced ones) will be willing to assist or aide their friend knowing that keeping the submissives edges down will allow that submissive to retain the majority of their rational functions while they are seeking their next mate. This action ‘reduces’ the submissives vulnerability. – Sub Frenzies, Mistress Steele
You may need and want to have your desires met with such fervor that you make the wrong decisions, but hopefully, I have given you tools here on Submissive Guide to recognizing what is safe and what is not. Frenzy is a natural response to the needs you are discovering. Allowing it to take over your other primary goals in life, however, is dangerous and should be monitored. Find friends in the lifestyle and talk to them when you are feeling a surge in desire. Try to keep the monster at bay until you can find an outlet in a safe and rational way.