Brattiness isn’t about defiance for its own sake, it’s about playful energy, consent, and connection. This article explores creative ways to express bratty behavior in a healthy D/s dynamic, helping submissives keep things engaging, fun, and mutually satisfying without undermining trust or respect.
How can I find new creative ways to be bratty? Read More »
Being outspoken or opinionated doesn’t make you a bad submissive. This article explores why personality traits aren’t inherently Dominant or submissive—and how honesty, communication, and self-awareness help you attract the right dynamic for your authentic self. Embrace who you are and find the partner who values it.
Is having strong opinions a bad trait in a submissive? Read More »
The original question comes from a male Dominant/female submissive context, and the response reflects that framing. That said, the topic is relevant to D/s dynamics of all kinds, regardless of gender. “Fair” is such a complicated concept. “Fair” seems like a measurable emotion, like something to feel- a pea underneath the mattress where you know
Is it fair for a Dom to not let a sub talk to other men, but have multiple subs himself? Read More »
This may be easier than you think, dear s-type! It is important to remember that finding the right Dominant or Top through dating or shopping around can sometimes feel challenging. I liken the vanilla dating pool to a bowl of cereal. Lots of individual options floating around. Now take a spoonful out and in there-
I want to be sexually submissive, but equal in day-to-day life. How to find a partner? Read More »
Question: Can you please do a post naming the different types of Dominants? There are so many different types, so there’s a great deal of curiosity. Answer: It is important to break this down into each side of the slash, so here are the general descriptions for some of the more common Dominant types. (Disclaimer:
What are the different types of Dominants? Read More »
I think it is important to break this down into each side of the slash, so here are the general descriptions for some of the more common s-types. (Disclaimer: there is no one right answer/definition, this is based on generalized experience; labels should always be the START of a discussion, not the end of one.
What are the different types of submissives? Read More »
Question: Last week, in the introductory phase, I had a Domme ask me what humiliates me. I hesitated to tell her because it also embarrassed me. Hope that makes sense. I ended up telling her, but it was very uncomfortable. What are your thoughts on this question, and am I obligated to answer this?
Am I obligated to answer questions about what humiliates me if it embarrasses me? Read More »
It is really easy to understand managing vanilla relationships around others (including kids living at home). It boils down to understanding one crucial concept: discretion. Discretion: the quality of behaving or speaking in a way to avoid causing offence or (IMPORTANTLY) revealing confidential information. We can mostly agree that kissing your spouse “bye” in front
Any tips for D/s dynamic with kids at home? Read More »
Full Question: Can two BDSM submissives have a regular vanilla relationship? What happens as the couple grows closer, and one person wants the other to change to a Top/Dom? Answer: Let’s start by saying there is no “normal relationship.” Can two submissives have a successful vanilla relationship together? The answer is “yes, two people can
Can Two Submissives Have a Relationship? Read More »
Full Question: Do you have any advice for someone already in a committed relationship (marriage, for example) who discovers that she is submissive or at least has submissive tendencies? Until this discovery, the sex was mostly vanilla with very light choking play occasionally (so my partner MIGHT have some interest). Answer: I have lived this
Advice for Newly Discovered Submission in a Committed Relationship Read More »
Explore a sample Master/slave contract that includes an ethical non-monogamy section. Use this customizable D/s template to create a relationship contract tailored to your dynamic.
Sample Master/slave Contract with Ethical Non-Monogamy Section Read More »
This is our current contract, making adjustments from our other standard version that has served us so well over the years. Over time it became ingrained in us. I knew when to kneel, how he liked me dressed, what he expected to be called. We needed something lighter, less clunky. I have made available our
Sample Master/slave contract – Basic Read More »
Looking for a BDSM D/s contract example? This sample template offers a guide to crafting agreements that define roles, set boundaries, and enhance communication in D/s dynamics.
Navigating D/s: A Sample Contract Read More »
The Mister and I signed on to live in a 24/7 Dominant and submissive dynamic pretty early on in our relationship. Like actually signed on to a physical line stating what we would or would not do in day to day living. I remember vividly drafting up a lengthy contract (about 6 or 7 pages)
Contracts as a Road Map to Ever-Evolving Dynamics Read More »
I was recently chatting at a local BDSM coffee event with a just-made friend who made mention (as she was just meeting my husband and I for the first time) that it was quite surprising to learn that he is the Dominant one and I am the submissive one. We get this all the time, if we
Don’t Judge A Label By Its Cover: Dispelling Stereotypes of D/s Roles Read More »
This is a six part series all about experiencing play from the right side of the slash. It is intended to be a helpful guide for you to push yourself further in your play, to experience new things, to open your mind and body to new sensations. I want to briefly mention safety in the
What Should I Try Next: Like Role Play? Try Medical Play! Read More »
This is a six-part series all about experiencing play from the right side of the slash. It is intended to be a helpful guide for you to push yourself further in your play, to experience new things, to open your mind and body to new sensations. I want to briefly mention safety in the beginning
What Should I Try Next: Like Orgasm Control? Try Forced Orgasms! Read More »
This is a six part series all about experiencing play from the right side of the slash. It is intended to be a helpful guide for you to push yourself further in your play, to experience new things, to open your mind and body to new sensations. I want to briefly mention safety in the
What Should I Try Next: Like Bondage? Try Mummification! Read More »
This is a six-part series all about experiencing play from the right side of the slash. It is intended to be a helpful guide for you to push yourself further in your play, to experience new things, to open your mind and body to new sensations. I want to briefly mention safety in the beginning
What Should I Try Next: Like Spanking? Try Flogging Read More »
Today I want to talk about scene reports: what they are, how to begin writing them, and most importantly, how they can aid and empower your playtime. I have only had one scene go really bad with my Master. In all of our years of playing, in all of the trials and errors, in all
