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Submissive Guide

Novice submissive tips from Submissive Guide.com Personal learning, growth and exploration of the D/s and M/s lifestyles.

This channel has frank discussions about BDSM, submission and kink lifestyles. If this offends you, please move along.

Submissive Guide
Are you feeling stuck in your BDSM journey? You’re not alone—and you don’t have to figure it out on your own either. The FREE Jumpstart Your BDSM Journey Bootcamp (July 14–17) will help you uncover your desires, build core skills, and create a BDSM routine that fits your real life. 🎓 Hosted by Dom Sub Living 💬 Free. Practical. Supportive. 👉 Save your seat: https://subguide--domsubliving.thrivecart.com/all-access-pass/6667922618e02/ On Patreon, you will support positive BDSM education for today and the future. You'll get early access to all of our newest educational content. We’ll give you sneak peeks and behind-the-scenes work for special projects and books in development. We'll continue the conversation in the comments section and private chat on our Discord server. No matter where you are on your journey, we'll be there to support you. ►http://patreon.com/subguide Thank you for the continued support on Patreon, which helps make improvements like this possible. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: https://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: https://subgui.de/podcast ►X/Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: https://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: https://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: https://patreon.com/subguide ►Substack: https://subguide.substack.com Check Out Our Books! ►https://shop.submissiveguide.com
Feeling stuck in your BDSM journey
On Patreon, you will support positive BDSM education for today and the future. You'll get early access to all of our newest educational content. We’ll give you sneak peeks and behind-the-scenes work for special projects and books in development. We'll continue the conversation in the comments section and private chat on our Discord server. No matter where you are on your journey, we'll be there to support you. ►http://patreon.com/subguide Thank you for the continued support on Patreon, which helps make improvements like this possible. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: https://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: https://subgui.de/podcast ►X/Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: https://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: https://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: https://patreon.com/subguide ►Substack: https://subguide.substack.com Check Out Our Books! ►https://shop.submissiveguide.com
You’re Allowed to Have Needs—Even in Submission
In this episode, we’re unpacking one of the most common—and most misunderstood—pieces of advice given to submissives: “Know your wants and needs.” But what does that really mean, and how do you figure out the difference? You’ll learn how to identify your core needs, why honoring them is essential to a healthy D/s relationship, and what happens when you settle for less than what truly fulfills you. We’ll also explore common submissive-specific needs, how to communicate them, and how to check in with yourself (and your partner) as those needs evolve. Whether you're new to submission or deepening your dynamic, this episode will help you reflect, realign, and reclaim your right to have your needs met. 📝 Topics covered: - The difference between wants and needs - Why needs matter more than you think - How unmet needs impact submission and mental health - Needs specific to D/s and power exchange - Why settling is harmful (even if the dynamic feels “good enough”) - Tools for identifying and ranking your needs - Reflection prompts and next steps Read the full version on Submissive Guide - https://submissiveguide.com/articles/personal-growth/why-identifying-your-wants-and-needs-is-so-important-as-a-novice-submissive/ 🎧 Leave a review or share this episode with someone you care about. Every listen helps more submissives find the tools they need to thrive. --- On Patreon, you will support positive BDSM education for today and the future. You'll get early access to all of our newest educational content. We’ll give you sneak peeks and behind-the-scenes work for special projects and books in development. We'll continue the conversation in the comments section and private chat on our Discord server. No matter where you are on your journey, we'll be there to support you. ►http://patreon.com/subguide Thank you for the continued support on Patreon, which helps make improvements like this possible. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: https://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: https://subgui.de/podcast ►X/Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: https://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: https://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: https://patreon.com/subguide ►Substack: https://subguide.substack.com Check Out Our Books! ►https://shop.submissiveguide.com
[Podcast] You’re Allowed to Have Needs—Even in Submission | Submissive Guide
This episode challenges the myth of the “perfect submissive” and explores how chasing flawlessness can lead to burnout, self-doubt, and disconnection. Instead of striving for an impossible ideal, submissives are encouraged to embrace authenticity, growth, and the beauty of their unique journey. Real submission isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being present, vulnerable, and enough just as you are. - On Patreon, you will support positive BDSM education for today and the future. You'll get early access to all of our newest educational content. We’ll give you sneak peeks and behind-the-scenes work for special projects and books in development. We'll continue the conversation in the comments section and private chat on our Discord server. No matter where you are on your journey, we'll be there to support you. ►http://patreon.com/subguide Thank you for the continued support on Patreon, which helps make improvements like this possible. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: https://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: https://subgui.de/podcast ►X/Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: https://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: https://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: https://patreon.com/subguide ►Substack: https://subguide.substack.com Check Out Our Books! ►https://shop.submissiveguide.com
Perfection Isn’t the Goal: Finding Joy in Your Unique Submissive Journey | Submissive Guide
Using your safeword is never something to be afraid of. While it may sometimes mean stopping the scene, it also prevents you from going to places you’re not ready to explore. Yet, guilt or self-disappointment can make using a safeword feel like a failure for many. Fortunately, there are ways to address the guilt, disappointment, or fear around using or not using your safeword when it truly matters. On Patreon, you will support positive BDSM education for today and the future. You'll get early access to all of our newest educational content. We’ll give you sneak peeks and behind-the-scenes work for special projects and books in development. We'll continue the conversation in the comments section and private chat on our Discord server. No matter where you are on your journey, we'll be there to support you. ►http://patreon.com/subguide Thank you for the continued support on Patreon, which helps make improvements like this possible. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: https://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: https://subgui.de/podcast ►X/Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: https://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: https://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: https://patreon.com/subguide ►Substack: https://subguide.substack.com Check Out Our Books! ►https://shop.submissiveguide.com
After “Red”: How to Manage the Emotional Aftermath When You’ve Used Your Safeword | Submissive Guide
Most people say ‘sorry’ or ‘I’m sorry’ far too often. You’re probably aware of whether this is an issue for you. If you struggle with frequent apologizing, you may need to take a different approach to find ways to express what you really mean. The Art of Apology Series - https://submissiveguide.com/articles/series/the-art-of-apology/ On Patreon, you will support positive BDSM education for today and the future. You'll get early access to all of our newest educational content. We’ll give you sneak peeks and behind-the-scenes work for special projects and books in development. We'll continue the conversation in the comments section and private chat on our Discord server. No matter where you are on your journey, we'll be there to support you. ►http://patreon.com/subguide Thank you for the continued support on Patreon, which helps make improvements like this possible. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: https://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: https://subgui.de/podcast ►X/Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: https://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: https://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: https://patreon.com/subguide ►Substack: https://subguide.substack.com Check Out Our Books! ►https://shop.submissiveguide.com
[Podcast] Breaking the Apology Habit: Alternatives to Overusing ‘I’m Sorry’
Get Your Copy of “Becoming a Service Submissive” Today! https://shop.submissiveguide.com/products/becoming-a-service-submissive-a-workbook-to-discover-your-style-and-enhance-your-d-s-dynamic Sub drop is a natural part of the BDSM experience, but it doesn't have to derail your enjoyment. Learn how to recognize the signs, prevent severe symptoms, and create a personalized aftercare plan that supports both your physical and emotional recovery. From building a drop kit to mastering self-care strategies, this guide empowers you to take control of your well-being and embrace every part of the journey with confidence. Hormone Junkies Series: ►Adrenaline - https://submissiveguide.com/fundamentals/articles/exploring-hormone-junkies-part-1-adrenaline ►Oxytocin - https://submissiveguide.com/fundamentals/articles/exploring-hormone-junkies-part-2-oxytocin ►Testosterone - https://submissiveguide.com/fundamentals/articles/exploring-hormone-junkies-part-3-testosterone ►Endorphins - https://submissiveguide.com/fundamentals/articles/exploring-hormone-junkies-part-4-endorphins More Resources: ►Sub Drop in Long-term relationships - https://submissiveguide.com/safety/articles/sub-drops-emotional-side ►What is Aftercare, Why Do You Need It, and How to Ask for It - https://submissiveguide.com/fundamentals/articles/the-question-of-aftercare ►Six Important Activities to Include in Your Aftercare Routine - https://submissiveguide.com/fundamentals/articles/6-important-activities-to-include-in-your-aftercare-routine ►Self-Aftercare - https://submissiveguide.com/personalgrowth/articles/caring-for-yourself-after-a-scene-self-aftercare ►Submissive Guide FetLife Group - http://fetlife.submissiveguide.com/ A very special thank you to all who have joined the Submissive Society on Patreon. You have helped transform Submissive Guide into one of the leading BDSM education sources online. We're overwhelmed with your generosity and support. Thank you. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: http://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: http://subgui.de/podcast ►Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: http://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: http://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: http://subgui.de/society Check Out My Books! ►https://www.submissiveguide.com/store
[Audio] Some of the Best Kept Secrets to Sub Drop Recovery | Submissive Guide
We’ll cover the complexities of online submission, offering various safe environments to explore and learn the nuances of BDSM and discuss the potential benefits and dangers. We’ll help you navigate the online BDSM landscape with confidence and care. https://submissiveguide.com/dsrelationships/articles/the-realities-of-online-submission Become a member and get more from Submissive Guide today. ►http://subgui.de/society We're stepping up our filming quality at Submissive Guide for you! Thank you for the continued support on Patreon, which helps make improvements like this possible. A very special thank you to all who have joined the Submissive Society on Patreon. You have helped transform Submissive Guide into one of the leading BDSM education sources online. We're overwhelmed with your generosity and support. Thank you. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: http://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: http://subgui.de/podcast ►Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: http://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: http://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: http://subgui.de/society Check Out My Books! ►https://www.submissiveguide.com/store
[Audio] Exploring Online Submission Truths Risks and Safety Tips | Submissive Guide
Description: A question I see asked all the time is, "How can I be a better submissive?" Here are a few things you can do to improve your submission and service without much work. Become a member and get more from Submissive Guide today. ►http://subgui.de/society A very special thank you to all who have joined the Submissive Society on Patreon. You have helped transform Submissive Guide into one of the leading BDSM education sources online. We're overwhelmed with your generosity and support. Thank you. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: http://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: http://subgui.de/podcast ►Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: http://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: http://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: http://subgui.de/society Check Out My Books! ►https://www.submissiveguide.com/store
[Audio] 10 Things You Can Start Today To Be a Better Submissive | Submissive Guide
Let's discuss how to build healthy communication skills in our D/s relationship and what a safe environment for difficult conversations looks like. I’ll give you the tools to develop a report with your partner that is full of trust, shared vulnerability, and compassion. You’ll learn that a safe environment for those challenging talks requires planning and mutual agreements to work as they should. Resources: Conversation Starters for Difficult Conversations: https://www.wikihow.com/images/sampledocs/f/Conversation-Starters-for-Difficult-Conversations.pdf Kink Friendly Therapists: - Psychology Today - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/sex-positive-kink-allied - Kink Friendly Therapy - http://kinkfriendlytherapy.com/resources-3/resources/ - Kink Aware Professionals Directory - https://www.kapprofessionals.org/ Domestic Abuse Hotlines: US: https://www.thehotline.org/ UK: https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/ EU: https://www.improve-horizon.eu/helplines A very special thank you to all who have joined the Submissive Society on Patreon. You have helped transform Submissive Guide into one of the leading BDSM education sources online. We're overwhelmed with your generosity and support. Thank you. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: http://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: http://subgui.de/podcast ►Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: http://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: http://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: http://subgui.de/society Check Out My Books! ►https://www.submissiveguide.com/store
[Audio] Creating a Safe Space: Enhancing Communication in D/s Relationships | Submissive Guide
Join us at 8 PM CST (UTC-5) on June 21, 2024, in the Submissive Forum voice chat on our Discord server for our Submissive Forum. Topic: Play Negotiation The Submissive Forum is open to all who identify as an s-type role, including switches with your sub hat on. The forum will present a topic for discussion and then be open to any questions and discussions about submission. To join our Discord server, just click this link: http://subgui.de/chat How to connect to an Age-Restricted Discord server from an Apple device: https://support.discord.com/hc/en-us/articles/1500005292701-Accessing-an-NSFW-Server-FAQ As with all of our Forums, this is a sacred space that is non-judgmental and confidential. Let's all offer each other support and guidance in a safe environment. To encourage a safe space for our attendees, no Dominants are permitted. Our Discord server is open to everyone 18 years of age and older. Make sure you sign up before the forum to test our server and your headset before we start. If you run into any problems, contact a server admin for assistance. Just click this link to join our Discord server: http://subgui.de/chat **Want to learn more?** Since 2009, Submissive Guide's mission has been to provide down-to-earth educational BDSM content that can really help people learn and explore kink and D/s relationships in a healthy way. That is our continued goal. http://submissiveguide.com **Able to Help Support Submissive Guide?** The generous pledges from members through our Patreon page help us provide current and future education opportunities for our community online. Please click here to join The Submissive Society: http://subgui.de/society _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: http://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: http://subgui.de/podcast ►Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: http://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: http://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: http://subgui.de/society Check Out My Books! ►https://www.submissiveguide.com/store
Join Us! Submissive Forum June 21 – Play Negotiation
Often, we discover our desire to be submissive or kinky when we are already in a relationship and are not sure really how to proceed with that. Let’s cover what you should do to prepare to talk to your partner about your newfound interest, how you can encourage a submissive mindset on your own, and how you can slowly bring kink into the bedroom. Initiating a Discussion about BDSM with Your Partner: ►Initiating a Discussion about BDSM Interest with Your Partner - ted_subby - Part 1 of a 3-part series. Highly recommended. - http://www.submissiveguide.com/2012/03/initiating-a-discussion-about-bdsm-interest-with-a-vanilla-partner/ ►Ask SehAnru | Communicating Kinky Needs to a Vanilla Partner - SehAnru - http://www.submissiveguide.com/2011/09/communicating-kinky-needs-to-a-vanilla-partner/ ►Establishing a Safe, Trusting Environment for Talk - lunaKM - http://www.submissiveguide.com/2011/05/establishing-a-safe-trusting-environment-for-talk/ Resources: ►Recommended Reading Lists - https://submissiveguide.com/fundamentals/articles/the-top-3-books-i-recommend-to-everyone-new-to-bdsm ►Creating a Personal Submissive Protocol - https://submissiveguide.com/skills/articles/creating-a-personal-protocol Join our Discord Server - https://subgui.de/chat Become a member and get more from Submissive Guide today. ►http://subgui.de/society A very special thank you to all who have joined the Submissive Society on Patreon. You have helped transform Submissive Guide into one of the leading BDSM education sources online. We're overwhelmed with your generosity and support. Thank you. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: http://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: http://subgui.de/podcast ►Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: http://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: http://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: http://subgui.de/society Check Out My Books! ►https://www.submissiveguide.com/store
[Audio] Navigating the Challenges of a Vanilla Partner in a Kink World | Submissive Guide
Receiving your collar is a special occasion for many submissives and slaves. When a collar comes into view, some people want to commemorate that with a ceremony. Let’s discuss collars, their symbolism in D/s and M/s relationships, and how you can build a formal ceremony around declaring your commitment to each other. See the article for related reference material mentioned in the podcast. Article: https://submissiveguide.com/dsrelationships/articles/how-to-plan-a-formal-collaring-ceremony Become a member and get more from Submissive Guide today. ►http://subgui.de/society A very special thank you to all who have joined the Submissive Society on Patreon. You have helped transform Submissive Guide into one of the leading BDSM education sources online. We're overwhelmed with your generosity and support. Thank you. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: http://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: http://subgui.de/podcast ►Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: http://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: http://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: http://subgui.de/society Check Out My Books! ►https://www.submissiveguide.com/store
[Audio] Crafting Your Collaring Ceremony: Themes, Rituals, and Celebrations | Submissive Guide
Let’s break down what topping from the bottom is, why it’s so bad, how it can be good, and learn some tricks to stop the poor behavior in its tracks that leads to it. Read the article: https://submissiveguide.com/fundamentals/articles/why-you-should-know-the-truth-about-topping-from-the-bottom Chat with the Discord community! https://subgui.de/chat Resources: Arcane Advice article on Topping from the Bottom: https://arcaneadvice.com/all-lessons-a-z/topping-from-the-bottom-why-its-bad-and-when-its-good/ Resistance Play: https://www.kinkly.com/definition/810/resistance-play Healthy Communication Skills on Submissive Guide: https://submissiveguide.com/search?query=healthy+communication A very special thank you to all who have joined the Submissive Society on Patreon. You have helped transform Submissive Guide into one of the leading BDSM education sources online. We're overwhelmed with your generosity and support. Thank you. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: http://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: http://subgui.de/podcast ►Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: http://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: http://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: http://subgui.de/society Check Out My Books! ►https://www.submissiveguide.com/store
[Audio] The Truth About Topping from the Bottom | Submissive Guide
Communication is a key topic to developing and maintaining healthy, open relationships. But many of us need to learn what good communication looks like and have problems with at least one part of good communication techniques. Read the article: https://submissiveguide.com/communication/articles/every-good-conversation-starts-with-good-listening ►http://subgui.de/society A very special thank you to all who have joined the Submissive Society on Patreon. You have helped transform Submissive Guide into one of the leading BDSM education sources online. We're overwhelmed with your generosity and support. Thank you. _____ Looking for Submissive Guide elsewhere? ►Site: http://www.submissiveguide.com ►Podcast: http://subgui.de/podcast ►Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/subguide ►Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/subguide ►FetLife: http://subgui.de/fetlife ►YouTube: http://subgui.de/youtube ►Patreon: http://subgui.de/society Check Out My Books! ►https://www.submissiveguide.com/store
[Audio] Every Good Conversation Starts with Active Listening | Submissive Guide
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