This post is part of an effort to provide a glossary for novice submissives of words commonly seen across this site and in the BDSM community.

A common question with novices is what is being collared, what does it mean? Is it like a wedding ring or something more? Something different altogether? First, some basic definitions for you to consider:


    Worn to denote submissiveness or slavery to a particular Master/Mistress. A collar given solely for a purpose of play is used to assist the submissive in achieving the headspace necessary for an SM session.


    To have accepted a collar from a dominant. This presumes a certain degree of continued submission the degree of which is up to the individuals involved and may range from highly dedicated to extremely casual.


    The ceremony or ritual by which a submissive becomes bound to his or her Master/Mistress. Collaring represents a serious commitment between the players and is not a part of casual play.

Furthermore, a collar is a personal item between the Dominant and submissive. Each relationship treats it differently and has different expectations. I can only give you a general idea of the importance of a collar to others since for me it could be a completely different meaning.

A collar is the outward (or inward) symbol of the commitment between two people to live in a D/s or M/s dynamic. It is a sign of fierce connection and should never be taken lightly. While it is easier to end a D/s relationship than it is a marriage, I feel a common perception is that it's just as permanent.


I'd like to open the floor, or in this case the comments section for this glossary item. What does it mean to you to be collared? How did you get collared? Was there a ceremony or was it just the two of you? How do you feel about collars in general?