Let’s start off with me telling you that I do have tattoos. I have one on my ankle that I haven’t looked at in a while and hope has faded (the name of a once love), my children s initials on my back that actually spell out BLT yes I’ve heard all the jokes! I […]
You Tattooed What on Your Ass? – Rational Thinking about Relationship Tattoos Read More »
They want submission but no emotional connection. Is conditional emotional attachment enough? Is He Emotionally Not Available, or Just Not Available? It is possible that emotional availability is not the problem at all — it’s just plain availability. All of us have busy lives these days. He probably has a job; he might have family
What to Do When Your Dominant is Not Emotionally Available Read More »
Ever since I entered “the lifestyle,” I have strived to attend as many educational demos as possible. My local dungeon, The Red Chair, offers a monthly educational demo on a wide variety of topics. Since I have always believed that we should never stop learning and teaching, I make an effort to attend those demos
The Returning a Collar After a Break Up Read More »
The reality of long-distance relationships, or any non-live-in relationship, is that you will have to handle periods of absence. It’s a painful and bitter reminder that you are not together and that your desires for each other have to go unquenched. But that doesn’t mean you can’t get through them with a few coping techniques.
Handling Absence in a Long-Distance Relationship Read More »
In the fall of 2006, my relationship with KnyghtMare was on the rocks. I was battling with submission and what it meant for my life with him. He was changing and growing more into his role. I think that we clashed because we just weren’t prepared for the changes in each other. I got in
When He Removes The Collar: The 3 R’s to Get You Back on Your Feet Read More »
The standard American “Disney” propaganda tells us in no uncertain terms that we are to hold our love and our bodies back until we meet “the one” with whom we will discover that magical connection. It will last forever and ever, and there will be happy endings all around. A lot of us, men and
“Being Loved” versus “Being In Love” Read More »
I know I say I use FetLife for a lot of my ideas on things to write about, and it’s true. There are many novices on there and the multitude of questions and topics that come up help me generate a lot of thoughts that I can put into words, opinions and hopefully helpful advice
There Is No Such Thing as Vanilla Life When You Are 24/7 Read More »
I’ve not experienced a D/s breakup and I hope I will never have to, but I have experienced heartache and divorce so I’m drawing my experience of those to write this post. I do hope that it will help those of you going through the painful time from the realization of the end and through
The Heartache of a Breakup: Recovering from a BDSM Relationship Ending Read More »
Sometimes it happens that there is more than one D/s or M/s family under one roof. Many wonder how this could work out. Sometimes this happens for financial reasons; while for others it happens simply because it can work and be fun. If your family is planning on moving in with another lifestyle family there
How More Than One D/s Household Lives Together Read More »
A friend asked me the other day what was necessary in a D/s or TPE relationship in order to make it fulfilling for me. It was quite an interesting question and one I’d like to answer here. First things first; a TPE or Total Power Exchange is where the submissive has surrendered all control to
The Bare Necessities of a Total Power Exchange Relationship Read More »
As submissives we tend to need to be reminded what we are doing to improve our lives and to give credit for success and progress no matter how small we may perceive it. This new project will help correct that I hope. The following questions are to be used as prompts for you to think
How The Honor Notebook Will Help You Focus on The Good in Your D/s Relationship Read More »
Like Luna, I’m also getting married to my Dom this year! We have been together seven years in February but it feels so much longer, I think thats a good thing though! When we met I wasn’t planning on it being a romantic relationship, I wasn’t planning on it being a D/s thing either, it
Love, Honour and Obey: thisgirl’s Getting Married! Read More »
Age or experience, particularly of the Dominant seems to always been in question no matter where you are. You hear it in forums, at munches and casual gatherings. So much of what we do hinges on that little bit of information. For many submissives that I’m acquainted with, there is no question that experience is important to
Age or Experience: What’s More Important in a Dominant? Read More »
The progress of a serious relationship leads to moving in with the other. Whether in a more traditional format after marriage or a modern stand of whenever the relationship is serious enough for that commitment, deciding to do just that takes preparedness. I want to talk about how to prepare yourself and your home for
10 Tips to Make Moving In With Your Dominant (or vise-versa) Smooth and Easy Read More »
This is a guest post by fuzzyP, a male submissive in a relationship with his Goddess and a regular participant of the Submissive Guide chatroom. “Is It True That Female Dominants Are More About Mental Than Physical Dominance?” This question intrigued me. It’s one of several Luna passed along to me, but I don’t know
Are Female Dominants More About Mental Dominance Than Physical Dominance? Read More »
Essentially I think we all believe that Dominant/submissive is an exchange of power but when you talk about it with others there happens to be two schools of thought on it. It can really get confusing because each side believes they are right. I’d like to present to you the two ideas and let you
Who Really Has the Power in a D/s Relationship? Read More »
There is an art to maintaining any relationship but a long distance one requires a bit more work because you rarely, if ever, see each other in the flesh. LDRs, as they are often called, can drain the parties involved and cause much stress to see flourish. They aren’t impossible to have, but quite difficult
7 Ways to Maintain a Long Distance D/s Relationship Read More »
After my last post on value which was about ownership and the transaction where my Master ‘bought’ me, someone emailed me to enquire about further ways ownership can be demonstrated and felt by the two people concerned. It really is a very personal thing. What means ownership to me might not be the same as what it
Collars and More: Symbols of Ownership in a D/s Relationship Read More »
Every time we have to face our family as a kink couple, Master and I have had to tone it down and disguise how we normally live our lives. Our family does not know how we live and they really don’t have any business knowing. I’m not going to ask my father what he does
Season’s Beatings: Navigating Holidays Around Your Family as a Kinky Couple Read More »
This is a guest post by fuzzyP, a male submissive in a relationship with his Goddess and a regular participant in the Submissive Guide chatroom. Since this is my first time writing in this venue, allow me to introduce myself briefly. I go by fuzzyP at the Submissive Guide and on other sites. In a
What Do Female Dominants Desire in a Male Submissive? Read More »
