Oftentimes, the first lines of an email to me or an opening thread in a discussion group go something like this; “I’m new and am nervous to ask these silly questions so be nice to me.” “I’m really embarrassed to ask since I’m so new, but…” “I’m new to the lifestyle and overwhelmed with all […]
It’s Okay to be New – Exploring and Learning as a Novice Submissive Read More »
It’s no secret that I’m an avid reader by all the book reviews that I’ve done for the site. A few months ago, I picked up a copy of Dark Secret Love by Alison Tyler. If you’ve not heard of it, think of it as a modern-day Story of O. Even though this is a piece of
Stop Being So Hard on Yourself-The Importance of Accepting Who You Are Read More »
Hi I need some help, please. I am in a relationship, have been with him for over 2 years. In the bedroom he has always been dominant, I am submissive by nature, and until recently when we discussed our relationship I thought we were doing things that satisfied both of us. At new years we
How to Initiate Play and Sex While Remaining Submissive Read More »
This is a guest post by moonlight. My days usually begin at 7am or so when our child wakes up (although sometimes it is much earlier). I send Sir a good morning message and I check in with the rest of our poly group too. I make breakfast and decide on something for dinner that night in case
A Day in the Life of a submissive – moonlight Read More »
I love the movie Frozen. I love it so much, I can’t quite stress how much I love it. I can’t even begin to tell you how many times I have watched this movie, but I can tell you it has been enough that Daddy can tune it out when I’m watching it for the
Learn to Let Go of the Past: Releasing Baggage from Past Relationships Read More »
Striving to be the perfect submissive can leave you disconnected from your true self. Learn why perfectionism harms your submission and how embracing imperfection leads to deeper growth and authenticity in your D/s journey.
Perfection Isn’t the Goal: Finding Joy in Your Unique Submissive Journey Read More »
I am new to a Dom/Sub relationship, for years I chose the wrong men because I was not sure what I needed. I have desired to be a sub for years and now I am acting on it, I have been given this site from Dom Friend who wants me to do some research before we meet. So
The Best Books for a Novice Submissive Read More »
There are probably two very sensitive and deeply moving confessions that a slave could make – admitting to being territorial and/or jealous. These demons are a complete terror and have visited many relationships since the beginning of time. In order to move about freely and enjoy the fruits of a healthy M/s relationship, they need
Back Off Bitches! Feeling Territorial and Jealousy as a Slave Read More »
This is a guest post by kaya from Underhishand.com. I live a fairly isolated lifestyle. I suppose in comparison to some people, you could say that I live an extremely isolated life. It’s not unusual for me to go days on end without ever leaving the house. I don’t answer the door, I don’t answer
Thoughts on Isolation and Feeling Alone Read More »
There’s nothing really super glamorous about my life, but I thought it would be a nice change of pace to write something a bit different from my usual and give you the readers a little peek into what an average day is for me. My days start usually at 6:30 am when the alarm goes
A Day in the Life of a Submissive – Tequila Rose Read More »
This is a guest post by Lazlo Toth. So much of what we do in this lifestyle has an aura of gravity and seriousness about it. From the clothing and accouterments, we choose to wear, to the names we give ourselves, to the things that we do in our relationships and our play. Dominance and submission
Humor and Submission:  Service with a Smile (and a laugh or two) Read More »
Feeling uncertain about what’s expected of you as a submissive? You’re not alone. This beginner-friendly guide unpacks the realities of D/s dynamics, clears up common myths, and helps you explore your own needs and boundaries. Learn how to talk about expectations with a Dominant, spot red flags, and build a relationship that fits you both. Whether you’ve already entered a D/s relationship or are still figuring things out, this article offers guidance, clarity, and reflection prompts to support your journey. Because submission isn’t one-size-fits-all—and you deserve to feel seen, safe, and empowered in your role.
Answered: Your Burning Questions About What Is Expected Of You As a Submissive Read More »
Being submissive doesn’t mean giving up your needs. This article explores how to identify, communicate, and prioritize your personal needs in a D/s relationship. From emotional safety to structure and love, you’ll learn why honoring your needs is essential for thriving in submission—and why settling for less isn’t an option.
You’re Allowed to Have Needs—Even in Submission Read More »
Things have changed a bit in our household in the past few weeks. The biggest change(and the one thing that has caused other things to change-yay snowball effect!)has been that I have started my German language course required by the immigration office This means that I now have class from 8:45 AM until 12:45 PM,
Being Submissive in a Vanilla World and How to Balance it Out Read More »
This is a guest post by an unknown author. It was found and marked as part of the public domain. Self-esteem relates to how you feel about yourself, whether you like yourself. Being submissive is not about being a “doormat” or a “lesser person”. But the sad thing is, many go through life feeling less
Self-Esteem in Submissives: Self-Talk, Affirmations and Self-Love Read More »
I LOVE “My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic”. Sometimes in the evenings before bedtime, I will sit and watch episode after episode. My personal favorite is Pinkie Pie. I see a lot of myself in her. In the series, there’s a group, and they’ve dubbed themselves “The Cutie Mark Crusaders”. The reason why they call
What’s Your Cutie Mark? Read More »
The other day I read a post on a forum where a new submissive had asked if there was a reason she was turned down from a Dominant who said she was too eager. She wanted to know why eagerness was seen as a detriment to a new relationship when all she wanted to do
How Being Too Eager Is Not Always a Good Thing for a Submissive Read More »
I didn’t realize I had Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) until I was an adult. I started to type, “I didn’t realize I was OCD,” but I am not the embodiment of a mental diagnosis. I have a mental diagnosis. There’s a difference. When I was growing up, OCD was defined as being attracted to certain numbers, and repeating acts like
Kink and Mental Health: Temporary Relief Read More »
I went to a local kink event and as an icebreaker, the host asked everyone to say what kind of animal they relate to. When I said I relate to a lioness, I got a ton of strange looks. I suppose it makes sense. As a submissive, it might not seem like I’d relate to
I Am Submissive–Hear Me Roar! Read More »
Recently I heard something in the midst of a talk about obedience that just made me stop and really think for a moment – and I mean deep thought too! Delayed obedience becomes immediate disobedience; partial obedience is complete disobedience. Yes, my mind had to reflect on the matter of obedience. Honestly, I can’t say
Obedience: A Slavey Meditation Read More »
